If Karen (I Am a Joke) Bass would not damage a fly, neither would she rescue one.

Think Karen, think zero.

As a member of Congress, it remains unclear whether she represents Covington, La., Covington, Ky. or one of the 53 countries in Africa where American troops are stationed.

This is our periodic update on Nomadic Karen, the oratorical dropout who evidently reps a hillbilly town in Tennessee or a corn stalk in Kansas. Somewhere because somebody who should be ashamed of himself voted her into office.

We could dial the late Christopher Columbus. Ask him if he has seen her hanging out in any seaside joints.

Nomadic Karen is allergic to home.

The vacant Congresslady loves to travel. She will go anywhere.

Any whistlestop in America except Culver City or the Crenshaw District, the neighborhoods she allegedly represents.

She embraces the bromide that “you can’t go home again.” Not that she ever considered this home.

Nomadic Karen needs s guide dog, three maps, two GPS systems plus a prod in the middle of her back to find City Hall.

Had she been with Columbus, America never would have been discovered.

“She has done nothing for Culver City since she was elected in 2010,” said one of the community’s most astute observers.

On Tuesday, mere minutes after the black actor Robert Guillaume died at 89, Nomadic Karen (likelier an aide) penned a lovely 260-word tribute:

“Today, Los Angeles lost a star and I, a dear friend.

“The light Robert Guillaume brought into a room was as impenetrable as the light that shined down on him on stage. He was a fighter; someone who carried himself by his own weight from the inner city of St. Louis to the bright lights of Hollywood. A trailblazer for black actors and actresses throughout the country, Robert’s contributions to beating back racial prejudice on stages across the country cannot be overstated. In 1985, he became the first black actor to win an Emmy for lead actor in a comedy series for his role in Benson, a feat that has unfortunately remained nearly insurmountable. Just this year, Donald Glover became only the second black actor to win the award. 

 “Always dedicated and inspired by his craft, Robert continued to challenge his limits, a truly inspirational journey to witness. I’ll forever remember his performance as the first black actor to sing the title role of “Phantom of the Opera,” appearing with an all-white cast, leaving jaws dropped and audiences remarking “We had no idea Benson could sing, let alone sing opera!”

“But sing he did, and sing he shall. His endearing essence and comforting spirit will be so missed. We could all afford to live by his words:

 “To assuage bitterness requires more than human effort. Relief comes from a source we cannot see but can only feel. I am content to call that source love.’

 “Robert, may you rest now, without pain or worry, wrapped in the love you hold dear.”

 On the same day, under, uh, her name (but written by an aide), we carried an essay (“A Crime That Trump Snubs Niger”) in which she professes fake sympathy for families of the four Green Berets ambushed in Niger on the African continent.

In actuality, the only reason she gave a darn was because the one black Beret has become involved in an orchestrated controversy.

Seven years in Congress, and Nomadic Karen’s unused scorecard still reads 0-0.