Dateline Boston — The family I nanny for moved into a new house last summer. I helped organize it—the pots and pans should go here, the storage containers here. The pantry was half useful. One side had built-in shelves. So it was easy to put food away. The other side had one shelf, and the rest was just one big space, not quite tall enough to put brooms and mops.
I decided to fix that situation. I made it my goal to find a piece of furniture that would hold food and fit in that side of the cabinet. After a few searches, I found it, right in my own kitchen. We had gotten a square-shaped shelf tower for our kitchen. After careful measuring, I decided it would fit inside the useless pantry in my second home.
Husband and I went to the store and got it. The next day at work, I started putting it together. I asked Toddler to help me while Baby looked on. Usually we leave Ikea furniture assembly to Husband, but this seemed like such a simple job, I thought I would tackle it. All the pieces were square or rectangular. How hard could it be?
Toddler assisted me by handing me screws and the screwdriver. The picture directions were okay…if your brain works that way. Mine doesn’t. No matter. I got one piece together, and I had to make another piece exactly the same. They looked like ladders. It was easier the second time around. I did it! I was so proud.
Should I Shelve This Task?
The next step was to put the shelves in; they attached to the ladder. I started to position the shelves, but somehow there weren’t holes on the side to put the wooden dowels in. Hmm. I turned the ladders over…and discovered that I had put one piece on backwards. On both ladders. I told Toddler I had made a mistake. We had to take it apart and do it again, like we do with puzzles! He knew this wasn’t a puzzle, and said, “Let’s just tell Mom we couldn’t do it.” I told him we were not going to give up. I proceeded to remove the big screws, the little screws and the wooden dowels. I put them back together properly, and started on the next step.
I got it all put together. All I had to do was tighten the screws with the enclosed Allen wrench. Somehow, some screws weren’t going in as easily as others. It was hard to see the tiny hole the screw was supposed to go into. My reading glasses were working overtime. I looked, and when I got too tired to look, I felt around. What was wrong? Soon it was time to go home. I vowed to continue my work the next day and be an example to Toddler as someone who wouldn’t give up. He looked doubtful.
The next day I started on my task with renewed enthusiasm. Toddler was excited, too, since it was the beginning of the day. I removed the screws and gave them to Toddler to hand to me. It was easier this time, but some screws were still stubborn. I put a band-aid on my finger, because the Allen wrench was really digging into it.
How Everyone Contributes
How was I supposed to tighten a screw with a little tiny wrench? I had to take Baby’s little hat and wrap it around my finger in order to tighten the screws. This didn’t seem right. The pictures of tools in the instruction book did not include band-aids and baby hats.
I had to take a break to put Baby down for his nap. When I came back, I put the TV on for Toddler, who had lost interest in being my helper. As I bent down to adjust a screw, I picked up the Allen wrench the other way, with the short end in the screw and the long end out. Oh, my gosh, what a difference. I twisted the screws in with lightning speed. Soon I had a shelf tower! I beamed at Toddler, who was more interested in what Daniel Tiger had to say on TV.
I went to the pantry and took off all the food on the top shelf and put it on the dining room table. I removed the shelf, and got the piece of artwork I had put together. I lifted it up, and…it wouldn’t go in, because of the hinges on the pantry door. I turned it around and tried it again. And again. I almost started crying, but I got a burst of adrenaline and thought, “I’ll just remove the hinges!” They weren’t ordinary hinges. They were industrial strength hinges, the kind that one might put on a bank vault. Undaunted, I took out one screw, then another. I saw that one part of the hinge went into the door and was painted in. There were three hinges all together. I gave up.
Toddler had wandered into the dining room and picked up a bag of orzo pasta that was open. He sprinkled some pasta on the floor. I hissed, “No, no, no. Put that down!” He picked up the bags of chocolate chips and asked if he could have some. I feverishly tried to put the pantry shelf back in its place so I could put the food back while talking quickly to Toddler. “Let’s see what Mommy says. Just a minute. Put that down. I just have to put these clips in the pantry so I can put the shelf in. Wait. Wait. Stop!”
I put the shelf back how it was, put the food back, and sat down, sweating profusely. Who needs an exercise bike when you can get an Ikea workout? I told Husband about my predicament. He’s going to look at the hinges when he gets back from his business trip. In the meantime, the shelf might be useful in the basement.
Ms. Vaillancourt may be contacted at snobbyblog@gmail.com
