In the last 83 years, Mickey Mouse, Elmer Fudd, Donald Duck, Superman, Batman, Catwoman, Hopalong Cassidy, L’il Abner, Zorro, Henry the Eighth, Sherlock Holmes, Edgar Allen Poe, Dagwood Bumstead, Dotty Dripple, Lassie and Sherlock Holmes all have cast ballots for Democrat candidates.
How do you think Democrats win elections?
- Last Thursday, America’s oldest play-for-pay girl, Hilarious Clinton, waddled onto the campus of a black university and told an audience of 80 percent empty chairs:
“What is happening is a sweeping effort (by new voter ID laws) to disempower and disenfranchise people of color, poor people and young people, from one end of our country to the other.”
Employing her movable setting-appropriate dialect, the flexible Mrs. Clinton said Republicans are “deliberately trying to stop” the aforementioned groups from exercising their voting rights. Republicans tightened voting laws based on “a phantom epidemic of election fraud” because “they are scared of letting citizens have their say.”
- Next day, The New York Times, commending Mrs. Clinton and her hairdresser for sounding every correct note, said that 50 million Americans are not registered, and by golly they should be voting. For Democrats. The Times said everyone in America with fewer than four legs should be voting, by golly. Pledging to collect more uninformed voters for Democrats, the Times said, mellifluously:
“Most significantly, Mrs. Clinton called for universal and automatic voter registration, which would register every American citizen at 18…Mrs. Clinton also called for at least 20 days of early voting nationwide, including evenings and weekends…Finally, Mrs. Clinton pushed to repeal punitive state laws that ban (6 million) people with criminal records from voting, sometimes for life.”
The Times said that “(m)aking voting easier for all eligible voters should be the epitome of a nonpartisan issue.”
- Alex Padilla, our Secretary of State who almost is young enough to be Mrs. Clinton’s great-grandson, with one eye on illegal aliens and the other on his wallet, says casting a ballot near home, or anywhere else you register, feels too darned inconvenient. Mr. Padilla, who favors granting the vote to illegal aliens as well as to all applicants for driver’s licenses, has another scheme in his hip pocket.
He says the state should mail a ballot to all voters. During a 10-day period before elections, the voter may cash in his ballot at any of several “voting centers” to eliminate the final hardship to voting.
These are some of the ways Democrats are elected.
If you will excuse me, I am going home to register my dead dog for the next election. His will said he is an independent.
