The cerebrally impoverished liberal poseurs over at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Junk Sciences are going to consider a proposition next week to nominate the top 973 films for Oscars every February.
Don’t laugh.
In a remarkably subtle effort to larcenously latch onto Oscars for People Colored Other Than White, Academy members will be asked to vote on the best 3200 actors of the year.
“Gotta be a colorful person of color somewhere,” scowled Cheryl Boone Isaacs.
Cheryl Baby, voted president of the Academy when she said it was no job for a nice white girl, who was born white but converted to blackism in her 20s.
“We will do whatever it takes to reduce the number of white-privilege elites,” sniffed Ms. Isaacs.
“There is strong sentiment for expanding the list of eligible actors and films limitlessly just as long as we can get some remotely qualified non-whites into the competition.”
In a further effort to broaden the formerly rigid base of voters, Oscar balloting, for the first time, will be opened up to black communities in New York, Mississippi, Wyoming (two persons) and California, plus three regions in Mexico to boost Latino representation at the Oscar show. In the newly certified voting precincts, no whites will be permitted to cast ballots.
“This is not so much about revenge as it is an attempt to get even for audacious Oscar injustice,” Ms. Isaacs said of the all-white Oscar field.
She added that 92-year-old Betty White will not be allowed into the ceremony on Feb. 28. “Too many white people in here already,” Ms. Isaacs said.
“Oscar who?” asked Ms. White.
