[img]560|left|Nicholas D. Pollak||no_popup[/img]My wife and I were window-shopping in an upscale shopping mall late one day, and near closing time, we turned into a shoe store where I asked the young manager if he would like me to analyze his handwriting, for fun.

He agreed. When I told him what I saw in his writing, he was amazed, as people seem to be, at what his writing revealed about him.

He said my reading was 90 percent accurate, thanked me and we left.

A couple days later, he emailed that he was interested in many of the ideas he had found on my website. It seems he suffers from social problems. He always has been anxious and uncertain. He never socializes at parties, tending to stand on the periphery rather than being involved. He prefers to watch or have one-on-one conversations.

He Had a Nagging Problem

The young man is in his very early twenties. I could see that unless his social attitude changed, he was not going to be happy with other people or himself. I asked him if he would like some help, and soon he came to see me.

A little nervous, he nonetheless was ready to see how hypnotherapy could help him.

I have written before about the “emotionally sexual” male, and he was clearly one. As is usual here in the United States, he believed he needed to be more outgoing because outgoing people suggested he should be. But appearing outgoing was uncomfortable for him. And it showed.

An emotionally sexual male is one who is not comfortable in a large group, prefers one-on-one conversations, dresses conservatively in easy-to-maintain clothing, keeps his or her body covered, prefers individual activities and always places work as the No. 1 priority. Individual activities are second and family is third.

‘Third’ Is Not Worst

Just because family is third does not mean emotionally sexual males do not care for their families. It means they work hard to make sure that they are a good providers. Usually, that means long working hours, which can present problems within a relationship. That, however, is a topic for another time.

The young manager and I talked about suggestibility, how we communicate. We talked about sexuality, our behaviors, and we talked about the theory of the mind, how to tap the power of our subconscious.

These conversations took place over three sessions, each on a separate topic. Hypnosis also was involved. It was used to help him to become less anxious in large groups.

He began to see that by eating more nutritious foods — richer in protein — by eating more frequently, he soon understood how to reduce, then eliminate panic and anxiety. The diet, with tools including desensitization and box breathing, were enough to completely eliminate his panic..

Now he feels better and he is relaxed at social gatherings. Realizing that it is acceptable to be who he is, he doesn’t try to act as aggressively as people have urged him to be.

No longer does he bow to peer pressure. He understands both quiet and outgoing behaviors are fine, but that he should do what is more natural for him.

Neither behavior is right or wrong, good or bad. Once he became comfortable with his behaviors, his life and his social outlook changed dramatically — and permanently.

If you have any questions please do not hesitate to contact me by telephone, 310.204.3321 or by email at nickpollak@hypnotherapy4you.net. See my website at www.hypnotherapy4you.net