“Thank you for waiting. All of our agents are still helping other customers. Please continue to hold for our next available agent.”

The nice thing about a cordless speakerphone is that you get to listen to that message while you are doing other things.

Like writing this essay.

Wouldn’t it be cool to have 5 different phone lines so that you could be on hold with 5 agencies?

But then, what if one or more of those agencies would come alive. Unfortunately, if you fed them back their original wait message, they would hang up. Why not have your 5 different messages pre-planned and pre-recorded.

(1) Yes, hello. My name is _____, and I was wondering if you have . . . .

(2) Yes, hello. My name is ______. I was wondering if I can buy . . . .

You would have to be really sharp though to listen for the 5 agencies’ responses to your automated answers and then to respond, live, to any one of them.

What if you just left pre-recorded messages stating what you wanted, giving your phone number, and asking them to call you back. But then you’d need another 5 phone lines to answer those calls – while you’re waiting on the other calls.

How many lines do you think one could juggle, and still keep track of the conversation? Two? Three? Four? Five?

How about someone doing a Ph.D. dissertation on the subject and letting us all know the outcome.

Speaking of waiting, do you do other things while waiting? Or do you just sit by the phone tapping your shoe?

What do you do while waiting? Write an essay, as I am doing? Read a book? Cook breakfast?

I don’t think this agency is EVER going to pick up the phone. What should I do?

I know. I’ll call the next agency on my TO-DO list today and wait.

You don’t have to wait to email me at: robertebsen@hotmail.com