Since the concept of “climate change” has gone through more different names than an old-fashioned woman married six times, a new tactic, born of necessity, was trotted out in the latest gospel released yesterday.

Near-term disasters dominate the weather menu instead of futuristic ones.

Ahh, I see.

“This is not some distant problem of the future,” said the last of the surviving Wise Men present at the birth of Jesus, one B.H. Obama. “This is a problem that is affecting Americans right now.”

For instance who, Mr. President?  He stuttered and fruitlessly glanced at the teleprompter for a clue.

“I can’t give you a name,” he stumbled. “I have not read the report.”

Oh.

Probably because if there is a climate change victim, he is on the way to the Comedy Central E.R.

Unable to fool a sufficient number of skeptical Americans into believing that the world will end in 50 years if we don’t mend our gaseous ways, an extreme tactic was demanded in the latest unimaginatively labeled National Climate Assessment.

I am reminded of the liberal comedians who tell the same jokes to the same audience seven nights a week. That is the way climate change stories are written. By rote, the medicine spoon comes to the mouth, low-information liberals open wide and swallow with a smile.

In olden newspaper days, obituaries of famous figures were set in type long before a star’s death so that they would be ready on short notice. That is what I think of every time the White House and their journalistic toadies screw serious looks onto their devious faces and shout the same warning they have raised in 500 verbatim stories.

Left-wing USA Today reported this morning that “devastating droughts in the Southwest, ruinous floods in New York City, killer wildfires in Colorado, intense heat waves in the Plains.”

Pretty darned normal. I would judge.

“Climate change is affecting where and how Americans live and work,” the newspaper added in Doyle Rice’s lead story labeled “Boo! 

The central tenet, the First Commandment, of every liberal’s creed is:

Do not be specific.

Left-wing reporting on global/climate/warming/change has heeded that dictum.

Environmental activists and the covey of chummy “climate scientists” who comprise the latest official reporting group of 240 lonely souls, went for immediacy.

Radical weather patterns will billyclub our never-again serene lives any day now.

Ring for the doomsday preachers who predict with unswerving certitude every year in May that the Lord is a-comin’ to git us sometime this month.

The scariest part is that Swish and his apostles kneel down every night and chant, “I do believe.”

Just before their preacher softly says, “Boo!”