[img]1|left|Ari Noonan||no_popup[/img]Applying the quotidian logic of the practicing journalists at the Los Angeles Titanic, if the Dodgers beat the Giants, 5 to 3, this afternoon in the baseball season opener, the boys at the Titanic will report tomorrow morning that the Giants actually won because, well, they did fail, but by golly they tried, and to a liberal, trying is pivotal.

Or didn’t you read this morning’s lead story?

It took two left-wing journalists to conclude, cloudily, that three-month Gov. Bald J. Retread admittedly bellyflopped and floundered like a beached, obese whale named Michelle, but he should be declared the unsmiling winner in the unsettled Sacramento budget battle over stubborn Republican lawmakers because by golly he tried, and you know how libs value trying, nearly as much as failing.

Since taking office the first week of January, Gov. Retread only has needed two Republican votes in the Assembly and two in the Senate to ram through his bold daylight scheme to create five years of new taxes to line the roomy pockets of wild-spending, heavy-taxing liberals.

Flush again, these undisciplined, busywork legislators — who need not meet more than one week a year — will be free to develop thousands more feel-good, I-am-a-victim programs.

I thought Bald was going to show Arnold how to govern?

Treating Republicans with chutzpah — hardline policy at the Titanic — the newspaper took the view on Page One that the governor, out of the richness of his generous heart, was giving lowly Republicans a chance to enter the game as equals, and by golly, the ingrates spurned his bountiful offer.

Because the Republicans didn’t take a tumble for this kid-level ruse, the Titanic declared them losers and crowned Gov. Retread champion again. Who needs grounds when you control the press?

Dessert for Breakfast

I had a spirited joust after breakfast this morning with one of the smartest men I know, City Councilman Andy Weissman.

Our entire debate could have been confined to the opening thrusts. If compromise is the door-opener to progress in politics, Mr. Weissman asked, why shouldn’t Republicans honorably give ground, as the governor supposedly did, in order to break the deadlock?

My response: Normally this would be an appropriate premise. But Republicans did not have a philosophical incentive to compromise. They vehemently disagree with the end game, confiscating years of new taxes, which they oppose, to fund faux, victim-centric programs that benefit liberal politicians in their campaigns.

What is in this for Republicans? The analogue is being served a naked plate at a feast.

“The Republicans blew a major opportunity,” Mr. Weissman said. “The Times focused on the fact that there was plenty of opportunity for a deal to have been struck that would have elevated the issues the Republicans were most concerned with, issues they undoubtedly could not have accomplished with a straight up-or-down vote in either house.

“In exchange, all they had to do was to agree to let the electorate decide whether to extend the taxes. And they blew the opportunity.”

I contend the governor, after 90 straight days of pleading, is the true loser, which we knew coming into office.

“The opportunity to come away with half a loaf rather than nothing should have been appealing,” Mr. Weissman contended.

I argued that Republicans came away with the total loaf. At least temporarily, possibly longer, they have forestalled the imposition of confiscatory taxes, which is victory.

The last words go to Mr. Weissman: “You say the Republicans were standing on principle. But principle only will get you so far. If all you care about is being able to beat your chest and say, ‘See, we beat ‘em,’ okay. But if the goal is to accomplish something — if they didn’t believe the proposals they made were worth fighting for, why put them out there?”

A Further Explanation

Why should Republicans surrender to their needy masters when they disagree with the premise? I keep asking.

“Gov. Jerry Brown won the blame game and lost the budget,” essayist Debra J. Saunders correctly summarized this morning in the San Francisco Chronicle. “Brown began with a proposal to put a measure on the ballot to extend the 2009 tax increases on income taxes, sales taxes and the vehicle license fee. It was a gamble. Voters rejected a similar tax measure in 2009. Most GOP lawmakers have signed no-new-taxes pledges. Even Brown didn't dare campaign on today's tax plan — and he’s a Democrat.”

Ms. Saunders said that Senate Republican Leader Bob Dutton told her he thinks the governor could have picked up two GOP senators if he had agreed to GOP proposals for pension reform, a spending cap and regulatory reform. But he would not concede on applying pension reforms to current as well as future employees, and he wanted too loose of a spending cap.

Intimidation, as usual, is the game of chesty liberals. They own Sacramento, and they own head-down loyal voters who are as compliant as a long table full of melting cupcakes.

Since Bald was a boy, Republicans, ever the minority party, have been treated like indentured servants. They are told they should feel lucky to breathe the same air as liberals. The hubris of Sacramento liberals places them in the same arrogance class as Bozo Obama. Outside of traveling the planet, their favorite game is taxing the rubes who never seem to catch on to this sucker scam.