Let’s Be Children Again
Mr. Bubar’s attitude toward Mr.Laase — essentially, it is none of your business, pal — explains in truncated form why many voters work up a sense of despisal about their nearest elected officials. It is so childish. So unnecessary. What is the salary/benefits package of retiring District Supt. Dr.Laura McGaughey is receiving? Nothing more personal than that. If an elected official conducts himself so abysmally in his hometown, in front of his friends and neighbors, imagine how he would whirl out of sight were he handed a slightly stronger cudgel. The number is going to be printed. Mr. Bubar may raise his voice. Mr. Bubar may stomp his feet, alternately or in tandem. He may even chew gum and walk in unison.
A Withdrawal from Memory Bank
When Dr. McGaughey’s most recent agreement was drawn up, I do not remember a caveat stipulating that Mr. Bubar was to remain seated for the next year and a half, until he comes up for re-elected a year from November. Nowhere did it say that Mr. Bubar was to sit on the darned document so that no one else could enter even the slightest peeky-boo. The delicious irony for the otherwise charmingly congenial Mr. Bubar is that he can keep getting elected as long as he runs because close to 100 percent of his fellow residents hold their noses when it comes to running for the School Board or voting for some of its members. This is like writing about the stunt by the slightly daffy gentleman who sets out to drive 125 miles to San Diego, at 100 mph, at 3 in the morning, while balancing a full glass of beer in his right hand without spilling a drop.
The Foundation Is Made of Jelly
With that, I shall launch the wildest guess of the year. Mr. Bubar’s politics lean toward progressive because liberals don’t like to call themselves liberals these days. This is just a blindfolded jump off the face of a mountain, you understand. Possibly, at one or two times during the six years of the Bush administration, I suspect that Mr. Bubar has criticized Mr. Bush for conducted himself irresponsibly by being, oh, I would say, childishly secretive. He is being devious, Mr. Bubar might guess, because first the President is a Republican, second he has something to hide, third it is illegal, immoral and unethical, and fourth through 20th, he is a Republican.
A Smashing Coincidence
By the most wonderful good fortune, Bessie, Sunday is Father’s Day. I don’t know if Mr. Bubar is one of those chaps who has everything. If, however, you are idle between now and the weekend and you feel disposed toward honoring the most senior member of the School Board, step into my office. I have a suggestion that a cynical person might label extravagant. Go to a mirror shop. Buy a large piece for Mr. Bubar. Present it to him on Sunday morning with the following thoughtful message from your friendly essayist: Next time a criticism of Mr. Bush’s secretiveness drifts into your consciousness, assume a position opposite this lovely mirror. Recall that whatever Mr. Bush has done, you, too, have contributed generously to the broad American disgruntlement with elected officials. You seem determined to pump up your own importance beyond recognition because you think that being elected School Board Member means being crowned the Keeper of All School District Secrets.
