Of Whores and Homes Offering a (Dumpy) View

Panting breathlessly as I pad down our long and winding 2-story circular stairway at home, I fling open the front door every morning.

Nudging aside the latest homeless interloper, I fling open my favorite biased newspaper, eyes darting frantically for the latest report on the newest maligned minorities.

The Predictable Boobs, Boobettes

What boob reporter at the Los Angeles Times, I wonder, has written about the latest I-Is-a-Victim claim?

For those of us with low expectations, the Times never disappoints. There it was this morning on a cover page:

“California has largest number of minorities (residing) near hazardous waste.”

Are you kidding?

I rushed back upstairs to shake Diane awake. How could this be?

Ever since we became devout environmentalists in 1990, worshipping daily, with straight-faced sincerity, at the altar of global warming, we have worked industriously to convince our white friends to rethink their priorities.

Why in the world would you want to live in a pristine, lily-white neighborhood when you could have a home with a view of hazardous waste? If we are going to blow ourselves up, don’t you want to be the first to know?

We Tried, We Really, Really, Tried

Tirelessly, both Diane and I have led scores of parlor meetings, in the city and in the Valley on this subject.

For 17 years, we have been hoping to sell our audiences — especially those with large families — on the fragrant joys of living as close as tolerable to a hazardous waste dump so minorities won’t be out there alone at night.

Let’s Be Inclusive, Boys

You know what the left tells us, baby: This is a multi-cultural world — isn’t that nice? — and we need to be inclusive.

And the Los Angeles Times professes to be mystified that it is a failing enterprise when it promotes sheer nonsense like this.

Even They Wouldn’t Fall For It

This is even too nutty for the journalistic redwoods at the Culver City Observer and the Culver City News to print. I think.

Mention of those 3 newspapers logically brings us back around to the topic of prostitution.

Our deeply dedicated left-wing friends are obsessed by the intensely related subjects of race and wealth. We know this because they write about them and talk about them everyday.

Who Cares If It Is True?

Even an attack on their spouses takes a priority backseat to the chance to write about the tongue-clucking volatility that results when race and wealth bang together in the same story.

These were the main ingredients in the overhyped Don Imus story. Mr. Imus is bad-because-he-is-wealthy and a white man vs. good-because-they-are-black girl basketball players whom no one ever heard of before last week.

The Only Important Story

Far, far more significant and substantive is the rape of 3 young white, well-to-do lacrosse players — and their precious reputations — at Duke University by a lying black whore named Crystal Gail Mangum.

Jealous of the boys’ skin color and their families’ perceived affluence, she cooked up a story that the boys had assaulted her. The pandering Democratic District Attorney bought her fairy tale in order to curry black votes since he was up for re-election last year.

Even a Child Could Tell?

What was pretty obvious from the start — the boys were telling the truth, she was lying — became official yesterday. Their lives, reputations and finances are in tatters, all because our left-wing media kept repeating the ugly canard.

The far-left faculty at Duke paid for a ghastly anti-white boys advertisement, which received national attention. Students, taking their cue from their liberal ventriloquists, marched and marched and marched. The boys themselves have been pilloried daily across the country for being immoral playboys.

Willing to be Fooled

The whore scammed the perhaps soon-to-be-defrocked Democratic D.A., all of the willing dupes at Duke and the always-compliant liberal media, which hungers to believe that white boys live to assault black girls, even whores.

The whore got away with her not-so-clever plan because, with America’s victim mentality, “rape” victims are not to be embarrassed “again,” and are allowed to remain anonymous, regardless of the size of their lies. Hmmm.

Wonderful Day for Stooges

Finally, these are terrible times to be a black man — read: sensible person — in this country because the black community, the serious black community, is bereft of adult leadership.

Blacks who are serious about their lives will pay no heed to the buffoons Jackson and Sharpton. They are far worse whores than the Mangum woman.

Not One Leader In Sight

Like a piece of jagged-edged driftwood in the middle of the ocean, America’s black community wanders aimlessly from crisis to crisis.

Home lives are train wrecks.

Without models at home to learn from, black girls get pregnant as soon as physically possible. Boys and girls ingest drugs because they listen to older black failures who tell them they should not emulate Whitey by studying in school.

Quick, Who Is to Blame?

Blacks routinely are the worst students in schools. When they cry “racism” because they can’t get into UCLA on a scholarship with a 1.1 GPA, Sharpton and Jackson dial their favorite reporters, climb into their pimpmobiles and roar through cheering crowds to the rescue, klieg lights glaring.

Pity the poor black man who only can stand on the sideline and weep at what a travesty life has become for one who cares.