How can you tell the re-election campaign of our Dear Leader, Mutt the Martyr, is treading quicksand?
When our consistently inattentive President decides out of a clear black cloud sky that he can nudge his polling out of the 30s, lock up the Latin/Latino/Latina/Latinee/Latinu vote for next year and greatly improve his chances by declaring that, on second thought, illegal aliens are not bad guys. We want ‘em ‘cause I need him. By golly, they are voters. They always fall for my line. By Murgatroyd, let’s let them stay.
The story:
“The Obama administration said it will review the cases of 300,000 illegal immigrants currently in deportation proceedings to identify ‘low-priority’ offenders —including the elderly, crime victims and people who have lived in the U.S. since childhood — with an eye toward allowing them to stay.”
Friends, “low-priority” offenders is the Obama definition for Democrat voters.
Wasn’t this a cool way for Mutt to circumvent the Dream Act, whereby college students and military types who are illegal aliens can win a permanent reprieve — if they promise to vote Democrat and call Republicans racists every day the rest of their lives.
Hispanics and their legislative pals, notably U.S. Rep. Luis Gutierrez of Chicago, entrenched in office almost 20 years, have been demanding Mutt loosen the noose on deportations unless he wants to be a one-term President.
I Swear to Tell a Lie
If you believe First Gear Janet Napolitano, the mama lion of the Dept. of Homeland Security, a veteran thinker, and her crack staff of bureaucrats are going to sift through 300,000 cases, do not finish this essay. Run out to your nearest drug dealer. Register Democrat. They need you. We don’t.
This audacious abuse of American law is such an amateurishly transparent electoral ploy that Mutt had to sneer up his sleeve and chuckle that once again he had made a wound-free getaway in the media.
Here Mutt was dashing down the steps of his Big Black Bus — a motorized tribute to Democrat diversity — and then dashing up the steps of Air Force One to fly off to another merited holiday, and whadda ya know?
In mid-tarmac, he interrupts his lack of thinking and declares to a crowd of two nearby admirers:
“Let’s radically change immigration policy before supper.”
Reacting with its typical, eye-rolling, flesh-eating alacrity, the Los Angeles Titanic, always atop the edgy news, posted three editorials this morning:
• Commending Mutt for shaking a finger at Assad five months after he started killing his own people and choosing to “lead from behind” in Libya (the war that was going to end within days, Mutt swore)
• A stale take on Bernie Madoff, who is getting divorced, and
• Hoping the NCAA is as tough on the University of Miami as it was last year on USC.
Illegal aliens? “Poof,” Mutt said, rising to a rare level of eloquence. “They don’t exist.”
Pardon me while I faint. Or was that an illegal alien I stumbled over?