[img]396|left|||no_popup[/img] When I met my editor on an airplane, we had an animated conversation for a couple of hours. One of our topics of conversation was titles, as in, what people call each other.
To me, titles are pretty fluid. I usually call everyone I meet by his or her first name because I was raised that way, and I think it’s also a generational thing. My mother’s friends were Kathleen and Dale. The boyfriend Mom had when I was eight years old was Al.
In elementary and junior high school, we called teachers Mr. or Mrs. Last Name. I graduated from an alternative high school where everyone, teachers and staff, went by their first names.
Name That Professor
It was the same in college. I graduated from a college where you not only were on a first-name basis with professors, you got their home phone numbers, too, in case you ever had questions. This was before email. The president of the college was also called by her first name.
The man sitting next to me on the airplane was thirty years my senior. Society was very different in his day. He seemed to imply that by being on a first name basis, one might not garner the respect one deserved. I disagreed. He asked me what my preschool students called me at school. I told him they call me “Alex”. That doesn’t mean they don’t respect me; they most certainly do. You know why? Because I respect them. You don’t need a title to earn respect. My boss, the teacher-director at our school, is called “Rosie” by everyone, including the children. One time a parent asked who the boss at my school was, and she replied, “Alex.” There you go.
As my seatmate and I were talking, I thought of all the people I call by title. Doctors. My cat’s vet (though I’ve heard other people use first names at that office). If I ever had the opportunity to talk to a police officer, I would say Officer So-and-So. Judges, too. I guess I feel for those professions, it is a sign of respect. Does this make me a hypocrite?
Sometimes it’s hard to know. When someone introduces him or herself as First name Last name, I’m left wondering what I should call him or her. Or, ahem, only last name, as my flightmate introduced himself: “Noonan.” I get around any awkwardness by always asking what someone would like to be called. “Noonan” is now Ari.
You can call me almost anything you want. Just don’t call me late for dinner.
Ms. Campbell may be contacted at campbellalexandra@hotmail.com
