A 35-year-old lady recently asked for help in reducing her stress and anxiety levels. Interestingly, she packed an enormous craving for sugar. That could be important because she needs to be focused every day for her job. She is a jet pilot.
Sugar is her major issue because it deepens her stress. Even though her job carries an unusual amount of responsibility, she should be accustomed to stress.
She appeared to be outgoing, but she confessed she is shy. Everyone she dates is more outgoing. Here is a problem: She does not want to stand in a spotlight, and it seems every boyfriend does.
This jet pilot was an emotionally sexual female. Her life priorities are work No. 1, individual activities No. 2, and family No. 3. As an Emotional type, she always chooses to work. When Emotionals work, they earn. Earning offers the opportunity to buy gifts for those they love. Buying gifts is how Emotional Sexuals give their love. They are less needy about sex. They must mentally see the sex act before reacting.
They prefer sex once every three days. Day One? No way. Day Two? If you catch them by surprise and they have a drink, probably yes. Day Three? Always yes.
Their sex drive is less than their very outgoing partner who usually is a Physical Sexual. For Physicals, family is the No 1 priority, any activity involving others is No. 2, and work is No 3. This does not mean they don’t like work, but rather that they are willing to let it slide if there is family business.
While there are major differences between these types, an immutable law of nature says opposites attract. Example: Look at a magnet, which has a plus and a minus. If you place the plusses together, the magnets repel each other. When you place a plus next to a minus, the magnets attract each other.
So it is in human relationships. Outgoing persons attract those who are much quieter. The latter may think she or he is practicing wrong behavior since everyone else seems talkative. With a more sociable partner, the quiet one hopes is extravertish behavior will rub off on her or him.
The outgoing partner reasons that by being involved with a quieter person,this will influence the extravert to tone down.
If these hoped-for changes work during their courting days, the new ways likely will be shortlived. Three months is typical. Then the honeymoon is over. Whether they desire it or not, they revert to their former ways. Result: Relationship strained
The key is to understand both Physical and Emotional behaviors, which will significantly improve a relationship. Not because they are opposite because they better comprehend what distinguishes them from each other. They accept that their behaviors are neither wrong nor right.
We learn to be the people that we are between birth and age 12. We are that way the rest of our lives.
My client the jet pilot had not realized the differences between the Physical and Emotional. Once she learned, she became more comfortable in social situations. Her stress vanished. With some conditioning, her addiction to sugar also was eliminated.
Do not hesitate to contact me by telephone, 310.204.3321, or by email at nickpollak@hypnotherapy4you.net. See my website at www.hypnotherapy4you.net
