Home OP-ED Shazam, Pander Bear Tells Lucky U.S. Arabs

Shazam, Pander Bear Tells Lucky U.S. Arabs

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What Democratic National Convention?

Just another day at the sweat shop for our good friend Swish Obama, or as we like to call him, Pander Bear.

Pander (When Folks Are Lookin’, Ah Don’t Pander to Nobody) Bear, who has culturally chopped up our country more finely than my wife does with Billy Barty onions, struck again this afternoon.

• A few months after noisily announcing that millions of illegal aliens of college age – especially Latinos (hooray for the Hispanic vote) – instantly were eligible to fearlessly pursue traditional paths of citizenship without looking over their shoulders for those pesky darned cops;

• A few weeks after secretly – in a hoarse whisper – declaring that he was hollowing the landmark, once-foolproof Clinton era welfare-to-work reform law, killing numerous looking-for-work requirements (hooray for the Sandra Fluke and other boobs vote);

• A few hours ago, good, ol’ Pander (Y’all May Call Me “Sneaks”) Bear punched us again between our unsuspecting orbs.

Panicked that he is trailing a man of sterling character, Pander pandered once more, this time to the Arab vote, which he thought he had clinched with his anti-Semitism.

By the most scintillating, definitely not cynical, coincidence, the Pander administration sent out a Hear Ye, Hear Ye to all who give a hoot about re-electing a Democrat panderer. Blushingly, the bulletin said:

Declaring it cannot make up its mind for an unbelievable third time, the Pander administration said it will need until after the Nov. 6 election to decide if Arab Americans will be added to the, uh, uh, protected groups eligible for huge privileges from the “Minority Business Development Administration.”

Meanwhile, vote for me, said Pander.

Get in line behind us and cover your heads, boys, not to mention your tushes. Once Pander Bear safely is re-elected two months from Thursday, he will drop the hammer on many of us.