[img]541|left|Carter Dewberry||no_popup[/img]Friday night I was ready to call it quits and check myself in to the farthest hotel a quarter tank of gas would take me from my studio.
I was convinced that this time I had really done it and committed too much. I was supposed to be making an album, scoring a film, AND getting married in 6 weeks?
This was not insanity. It was full-on craziness.
The problem was, even thoughts of giving up tasted more metallic than the worst over-sterilized water. My brain couldn’t stomach it.
And so I steadied myself from my latest bout of panic with yet another round of intense cardio exercise followed by deep ujjayi yoga breaths.
The Email
Then I opened the email sent by a dear friend. In this note, he mused on how most people quit trying when they get just before the finish line. In letting up in the final breaths, they miss the triumphant breakthroughs experienced by shattering self-made limits and expectations.
I gritted my teeth even harder and persevered. For the next three days, I focused so intently on my desired outcomes that the tunnel vision blocked out all but the loudest inner doubts.
Tonight, at the end of my 3-day weekend, my album has been fully recorded and edited, and I just sent my first draft of my movie score to the director.
All this and I had time to take my fiancé on a surprise picnic for Valentine’s Day. Talk about breaking through…
Now, in the stillness of night, I wait patiently to experience the aftershock tremors of moving mountains I thought immutable.
Ms. Dewberry, an accomplished cellist, completed her DMA in Chamber Music Performance from UCLA in December 2005. She received her MM in Cello Performance from UCLA in June 2002 and her B.M. in Cello Performance from Western Michigan University in April 1998. She also holds a B.A. in French with a minor in Women's Studies and Philosophy.
Ms. Dewberry is celebrating the release of her latest album, “Origins.”
Her website is www.carterdewberry.com
She may be contacted at carter@carterdewberry.com
