[img]2332|right|Cathleen Decker||no_popup[/img]Always honored to help rescue a fellow journalist from a stinky heap, especially of her own doing.
Fingers perspiring, gradually changing color, I panickily dialed 9-1-1 early this morning before I was halfway through Chatty Cathy Decker’s fictionalized account in the skinny Los Angeles Titanic of Sucker Obama’s shameless pandering of the Danish Pastry Prime Minister two days ago at Nelson Mandela’s alleged memorial service.
An aging hard lefty, Chatty, 9,000 miles away, swore it never happened. He’s a liberal and part-time socialist. He would not lie, unless it were necessary. Breathing harder as she typed, she told gullible Titanic readers it was a racist Republican plot cooked up to embarrass a leader who probably was going to confession to Ms. Danish Pastry, not sinning.
The undeniable photographic evidence, however, is that once Sucker Obama espied Danish Pastry’s sensational legs, he forgot himself. For a moment, he thought he was back in the audience for a Hee-Haw audition.
Not wanting to take chances with a precious older leftist’s life, I called the EMT boys at daybreak this morning. In creatively writing a cartoonish denial that Sucker Obama was going low-brow again and Mad Michelle was pondering marital mayhem again, Chatty Cathy hoped to resurrect her midget-y career. Why if any former Mrs. Noonan had stood up that stoutly for me, when she knew the truth, we would still be waddling in wedded bliss. Chatty Cathy hereafter may be known as Snacky Cathy. She had twisted herself, by thunder, into a pretzel chokehold. She coughed. She gasped, just as all Titanic journalists do when a Republican President is elected by informed voters.
Applying the theory that to criticize the most ignorant President since Jimmy Carter’s half-wit brother would be racist, Chatty Cathy wrote. Straightening her chapeau that kept tilting over, she wrote that Sucker Obama did not really want to taste Danish Pastry. And Mad Michelle, she testified, always looks like a rabid dog has sprayed year-old motor oil all over her pretty face.
My gosh, you must exercise so many working parts every day just to be a hardcore liberal and defend a dopey President who blew his chance to play host to the bucolic hicks on Hee-Haw.
