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My Life from A to Z

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Dateline Boston — This week I thought I’d give myself a little creative writing assignment. I’ll list my life in alphabet form. At first, I figured I’d come up with a word for each letter, and that would be it. When I started the list, however, I found that I often had more than one word per letter to describe my life. It’s turned into more of an essay than a list. It’s a good exercise—try it!

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A is for Alex. My professional name is Alexandra, but really. Everyone calls me Alex. Not Alice.

B is for Birthday. I love to celebrate my birthday, and have waiters sing Happy Birthday to me in a restaurant. It is currently 10 days until my birthday.

C is for Chiropractor, Computer, and Cell phone
. These three things have changed my life, although I resisted all of them for a long time.

D is for Dead bugs. I have a collection of dead bugs in my apartment; I keep each one in a clear plastic container for easy viewing. One of my most prized bugs is a cicada I brought back from Japan. It was dead when I smuggled it into the country.

E is for Exercise Every day. I have a series of exercises I’m supposed to do daily. When I do my exercises, I put a red X on my calendar. Usually, my calendar looks pretty blank, with one or two X’s on it. I have to get better about exercising every day.

F is for Facebook. I am on Facebook a lot. I love keeping in touch with people from my past and present, and I’ve also met people I would not have met if not for Facebook. Facebook forever! Until the next thing.

G is for Grass. I am allergic to grass. It’s too bad, because one of my favorite scents is freshly mowed grass.

H is for Hearts. I take pictures of hearts I find in my travels. I have over 50 of them. My rule is that I can’t touch something to make a heart shape; I have to find it that way. I am glad I don’t see the face of the devil in my travels.

I is for Improv
. I’m currently taking an Improv class, that kind of comedy where you work as a group and make up stuff on the spot. Kind of like writing a column on the eve of your deadline. Not that I’ve ever done that. I’m in Improv Level 2, by the way.

J is for Japanese. I speak a little Japanese, but it sounds funny. If I were to say that in Japanese, it might sound like I was saying, “Speak I Japanese a little bit, strange sounds like.”

K is for Karma. I believe in karma. Pay attention to your behavior—how you act will come back to you, good or bad.

L is for License. I have a license, but I don’t drive. I can, in an emergency, but I don’t like to. I can also spell “license” without needing spell checker.

M is for Music. I listen to music on my iPod every day. I can’t live without music. All kinds, from opera to pop. But not heavy metal.

N is for Nap. I love to take naps, particularly on the weekend. My naps usually last between 30 minutes and an hour. You know how you can feel all discombobulated and cold when you wake up from a nap? That never happens to me.

O is for Olive
. I used to not like olives, but I read somewhere that to like a food, you have to try it ten times. I did that with olives, and I liked them on the eighth time. Now I love olives. But only the black ones.

P is for Pedicures. I love to get pedicures, even in the winter. But at my nail salon, the technicians always cut my left big toenail too short, and then I get an ingrown toenail. They speak Vietnamese there, and I always think I should look up how to say, “Please don’t cut my big toenail too short because I always get an ingrown toenail” in Vietnamese. I always forget, until I’m at the nail salon again.

Q is for Qat
, the only Q word that doesn’t have a U that I remember when I play Scrabble. It’s a great Q word to remember. Q-A-T. I think it’s a bush.

R is for Red
. Red is my favorite color. Always has been, even when I was a kid and purple was the cool color to like.

S is for Shelby and Scrabble on Sundays. Shelby is my 13 ½ year old Maine Coon mix cat. She is my pride and joy. I play Scrabble on Sundays with my friend Amy. She almost always wins. When she doesn’t, she triple checks to make sure, and I gloat.

T is for Tattoos and Teaching. I have a lot of tattoos. They allow me to express myself and be a permanent rebel underneath my conservative appearance. I am currently a preschool teacher, but I have taught people from preschool through adulthood. I will teach anyone, anywhere, anytime.

U is for Umbrella
. Umbrellas are a necessary item for city slickers like me, but I can’t stand them. I open mine only when it’s really pouring.

V is for Volleyball. I would rather stick a needle in my eye than play volleyball.

W is for Writing. I love to write. I try to write every day, but I have to write at least once a week. I’ve discovered that having a deadline is helpful.

X is for X-ray. X-rays are pretty cool, except when they show on the news some woman who stuck a needle in her eye rather than play volleyball and it’s still there and you can see it in the X-ray.

Y is for Young-looking. I have always looked younger than I am. It’s great now, but when I was twenty-one and looked like I was fifteen, I hated it. Also when I was eight and looked five.

Z is for Zipper. I am an expert at getting zippers unstuck.

I hope you enjoyed my exercise. When you do yours, don’t be afraid to use the dictionary if you can’t think of a word. I did. Volleyball, anyone?

Ms. Campbell may be contacted at campbellalexandra@hotmail.com