Face it: The truth is, Eric Garcetti, who finished first last night in the Los Angeles mayoralty voting but faces a runoff against City Controller Wendy Greuel, is deadly dull.
I judge all political speeches I have eyewitnessed over a lifetime against the Solid Gold Standard set by JFK during the 1960 Presidential Campaign outdoors on the Grand Concourse in the Bronx.
By comparison, Eric was strictly from Amateur Night late Tuesday at the Avalon. When he delivered the speech everyone came to hear, it was as if someone had let air out of all four of his tires – just short of a flat.
At the end of Eric's address to the anti-Greuel troops, there was a half-hearted attempt to get an Eric! Eric! Eric! chant going. It quickly petered out.
If the spark isn't generated from the crowd and aimed straight at Eric, then Garcetti is powerless to supply the crowd with a spark of his own aimed at his audience.
Either you are born with this speaking power or not. You can't learn how to accomplish that kind of magic. There was no magic at the Avalon last night on the same Vine Street stage where Martin and Lewis, Abbott and Costello, Eddie Cantor and Lawrence Welk used to wow audiences, stopping the show!
That said: Actually Eric is a slightly better political speech-maker than Wendy.
When I arrived at 9:45, the Avalon was fairly crowded. Once the complimentary food ran out and the leftovers were swept away by staff around 10:30 , the desultory crowd started to thin out.
By the time Candidate Garcetti took the stage, a little after 11 o’clock to include himself on the regularly scheduled news shows for that hour, no more than 300 partygoers were still in the house. His audience became slightly closer to deflated than pumped up…to boot.
Eric's hardly inspirational talk last night seemed to last not much more than 10 minutes. Mostly, it was devoted to obviously insincere praising of his opponents; especially kissing Jan Perry's butt before Little Ricky begs Jan for her endorsement this morning.
Eric's mercifully short and demonstrably un-inspired speech met with little more than polite applause.
At no time during the Garcetti party did anyone feel motivated to dance. A sure sign of group dynamic malaise. On the bright side for Garcetti, reports indicate Wendy's wing-ding included a similar number of Wendy zombies.
By 11:45, the Garcetti crowd was reduced to just a few stragglers gabbing to one another .
Garcetti also announced his kick-off/ run-off event, scheduled at the old Van De Kamp's Bakery site this morning at 11.
Is Councilman Garcetti planning to ditch the L.A.City Council meeting scheduled for this morning at 10 in favor of attending a mayoral bid event of his own making for the second time this week?
Mr. Walsh may be contacted at hollywoodhighlands.org
