[img]541|left|Carter Dewberry||no_popup[/img]Some have said it is a blessing, others a curse. I cannot decide. All I know is that I have always had almost more options than I can handle.
In this last week, while on tour, I have been asked numerous times by students, reporters, and other inquisitive folk if I always knew I would be a professional cellist. It would make a great story to say that I have known ever since I touched a cello at age eight that this would be my life. Unfortunately, that would be a lie.
The truth is, I thought I would end up as a scientist, lawyer, doctor or maybe an engineer. I never really imagined myself as an artist. I figured I was too smart to choose such a life of constant self-examination, doubt and reinvention.
Today, after having quit music a few times in my life, I recognize that it – and my cello – will always be a part of my expression.
One would think I experience relief in this fact. Not quite.
As I stand speaking to the students, I can inspire them to follow their dreams by sharing what I have been able to create in my life. What I have realized in this process, however, is that I am now at another crossroads.
In the last few years, I have released two solo albums, completed my first film score, produced my own soundtrack, produced a successful multi-disciplinary show and composed dozens of songs.
I am now asking myself the questions, “What next? What will be my next large-scale project?”
Thinking about this next step, I want to crawl into a hole. I know my pattern. I know my next creation will be bigger than anything I ever imagined. This thought exhausts and terrifies me.
Thankfully, I have another week on tour where I get to celebrate what I have already accomplished before I have to stare at myself in the mirror for hours and then turn to a blank sheet of paper.
I will be in Michigan and then Milwaukee for performances throughout this week. Please check my website at www.carterdewberry.com for more information. This may be the last opportunity to see me perform live for some time…
Ms. Dewberry, an accomplished cellist, completed her DMA in Chamber Music Performance from UCLA in December 2005. She received her MM in Cello Performance from UCLA in June 2002 and her B.M. in Cello Performance from Western Michigan University in April 1998. She also holds a B.A. in French with a minor in Women's Studies and Philosophy.
Her website is www.carterdewberry.com
She may be contacted at carter@carterdewberry.com
