In the midst of the liberal Nut Patrol hysterically donning clown uniforms and chasing the idiotic notion of gun control, the Los Angeles Titanic this morning served up fresh evidence why one of America’s least reliable journals has shed fully 50 percent of its circulation in the past six years, a nifty accomplishment.
May they never rest in peace.
As U.S. Attorney General for the past four years, Eric (The Trigger) Holder has been an ideal model for America-hating parents who want their children to grow up as reliable liars and venemous racists.
Naked old-fashioned racism, with Trigger in the saddle, drives his hateful days.
Sensing an increasingly indelicate nudge, Trigger is planning, uh, to leave the scarred Obama administration in the first quarter of the new year.
Does History Have to be Truthful?
The Titanic, via the roaming revisionism of Dickie Serrano, one of its B-grade Washington bureau reporters, set out to lionize Trigger in this morning’s print edition, which means truth was mangled more cruelly than those 20 children in Newtown.
Hemingway fiction at its bloomingest.
At times, Trigger has seemed to engage in to-the-death lying matches with his boss, President Obama. Neither can maintain an honest face or a straight tongue outside of the Oval Office.
Trigger has told Congress more lies than anyone in the last 40 years outside of Bill Clinton and the Watergate crowd.
You never would know it from the mainstream left-wing press.
For more than a year, Trigger lied so maliciously and brazenly when testifying before Congress on the Fast and Furious gun-running boondoggle into Mexico that some members had to excuse themselves, dash to the corridor and vomit.
When Trigger’s boss was elected the first time, three ugly, armed black hoodlums, calling themselves Black Panthers, intimidated white voters at a Philadelphia voting precinct – on video.
Trigger waited until the Philly furor died down, ducked behind a chair, held one sweaty hand over his dishonest mouth and announced he was dismissing the case – because, uh, they were black.
Please Don’t Giggle at Me
Trigger made an unintentional joke of himself chasing around the country after newly enacted voter ID laws last summer, and the same Hysterical Harrys crying today for gun control formed a buffoonish posse behind him.
My favorite recently unveiled fact to be revealed in Dickie’s novelistic story this morning concerned Trigger’s frequent and lengthy privet, anti-working excursions, hundreds and thousands of miles away from Washington.
Let’s see now. Can anyone out there in Newspaperland think of a lazy President who flees Washington for extended, expensive vacations each time work is to be done? Hmmm.
In a clear slip of the finger, Dickie confesses Trigger’s underlings, by darn, began to feel Trigger just was not interested in the Justice Dept.’s day-to-day work.
Conceding at strategic junctures in his Gee, You Are Terrific piece that Trigger has warts, Mr. Serrano boldly zeroed in on the undoubted cause:
And the Losing Name Is…
You never will guess the identity of the bad guys, the chaps who made Trigger misbehave.
Mr. Serrrano gave us his opinions:
• “(A)n often strident Republican-led House (of Representatives) that fought him over issues of border security, terrorism prosecutions and undercover gun operations.”
• “Republicans might have attacked any Obama administration attorney general.”
• “As the years unfolded, the GOP increasingly sparred with Holder over many of his other efforts.”
Thank good, dear reader, none of Trigger’s sallies into Bad Behavior Land were his fault.
“I think Holder got caught in the middle,” said a girl from the ACLU.
“He was just a (Dept. of Justice) guy and believed in the department, and where he got in trouble was in part because of politics and political issues,” said a boy wonder from Justice.
“There has been an effort to smudge his reputation,” said a genius from the Leadership Conference on Civil and Human Rights.
Now if you will excuse me, I must step into the corridor.
