Home Editor's Essays The Other Side Gets Cornered with its (Smarty) Pants Down

The Other Side Gets Cornered with its (Smarty) Pants Down

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[img]1|left|Ari Noonan||no_popup[/img]I was so chilly this morning that for the first time this winter, I turned on the heat in my office for three hours.

As you know, this is irrefutable proof of global warming.

Last summer when I occasionally flipped on the air conditioning, my friends on the left said this was irrefutable evidence of global warming.

When your friends and relatives in New York suffered through one of the great blizzard shakeouts of their lifetimes a fortnight ago, the extreme weather proved that it is a fool’s errand to deny global warming/climate change.

Every change of weather since Al Gore started making millions off global warming is proof, we are ordered to believe by our betters, that by golly, global warming is gonna catch us and eat us up. Well, not the disciples, just us dumb deniers.

One of the two smartest men in California, Prof. Victor Davis Hansen has branded the left’s unbudgeable stand on global warming as an “unfalsifiable hypothesis.”

In his latest essay says those smart people from Swishie on down, or on up, nearly converted him until he realized:

• “England is freezing and snowy, though global-warming experts assured that the end of English snow was on the horizon.

• “Australia is now flooding — despite predictions that its impending new droughts meant it could not sustain its present population.

“In response to these unexpected symptoms of blizzards and deluges, climate physicians offer changing diagnoses. ‘Global change’ has superseded ‘global warming. After these radically cold winters, the next replacement appears to be ‘climate chaos.’ Yet if next December is neither too hot nor too cold, expect to hear about the doldrums dangers of ‘climate calm.’”

I was reminded of Prof. Hanson’s stunningly funny “unfalsifiable hypothesis” over the weekend as the banty rooster roster of self-parroting liberals declared, as soon as they could reel in a the nearest reporter, that the dastardly slaughter in Tucson was ignited by the right because…

Wait a moment. Time out. Our crack research staff is reviewing the most reliable test-marketed explanations. Here is the winner.

“Regularly ratcheted up right-wing rhetoric, especially that magnetic murderer of language and some people, Ms. Sarah Palin.”

Unlike most athletic teams, the right, according to the left, is undefeated. It owns a perfect score for triggering — you will forgive the sweet irony of the verb — all outbreaks in recent times.

Faulting the right for each mass disaster in or linked to America, a tradition with left-wing patriots, is resplendent with common sense for two reasons:

The left owns the printing press.

The left runs all but one of the television networks.

Those are the fastest strategies for guaranteeing that truth and justice are on your side. Outnumber the bums. Either Plato or Arianna Huffington taught me the veracity of that.

My computer has groaned the last 50 hours, so weighted down is it with charges by the left:

“We are choirpersons while far-right conservatives, starting with Ms. Palin, are chiefly responsible for the plight of the Arizona Congresswoman and the six fatalities.”

The charges have slowed to a dribble since examples such as the following were unearthed. You remember “Bush Lied, People Died,” and Swishie’s bubble-eyed rants.

The next example spotlights one of my favorite ladies screaming about one of her favorite topics, racism, courtesy of Jay Nordlinger of National Review:

“Diane Watson, a congresswoman from Los Angeles, said, ‘They are spreading fear and they’re trying to see that the first president who looks like me fails.’ Watson is black. Who are ‘they’? Obama’s health-care critics. Watson went on to heap kooky but common praise on Fidel Castro, and the old dictator himself got into the act. He wrote in his state media (the only media there are in Cuba), “The extreme Right hates [Obama] for being African-American and fights what the president does to improve the deteriorated image of [the United States]. I don’t have the slightest doubt that the racist Right will do everything possible to wear him down, blocking his program to get him out of the game one way or another, at the least political cost.”

The case and I shall rest.