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Let Me Snivel One More Time, Says Wendy

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Next to whining Wendy Greuel, the funniest post-election mortem was coughed up by the Los Angeles Titanic’s Jim Newton. His Uncle Sir Isaac must have bounced one of his trademark rotten apples off nephew’s cranium.

Listing five reasons Ms. Greuel’s  ramshackle campaign for mayor flopped like a fat lady in a broken beach chair, No. 2 was:

“Greuel didn’t stress the historic nature of her campaign. She could have been Los Angeles’s first female mayor. She tried to make up for the missed opportunity near the end, but by then it was too late.”

I kept waiting for Mr. Newton to throw the punch line. Where was he.

Her “I am a victim” mantra bled ugly through every speech, public and private.

Every time I saw her, Ms. Greuel was flailing her arms, complaining bitterly that she was a permanent victim in the mayor’s race because she was a girl. Shamelessly, she threw herself on the mercy of mature women. Begging like a street-corner hustler, she wailed,  “Vote for me because I am a girl.”

By Election Day, women showed the incessant whiner how smart they are. A greater proportion voted for Mayor-elect Garcetti.

The day after the election, the disorganized, emotionally wrecked Ms. Greuel’s campaign was being called the most disheveled ever conceived in Los Angeles.

Vituperatively, Ms. Greuel stamped herself a brave broad.

Fighting off always-available tears, she mumbled: “You showed the daughters, sisters, wives and mothers of Los Angeles that one day we will have a woman mayor of Los Angeles.”

And my pop can beat up yours any day, Wendy.

Like a deranged person, woolly-headed Wendy, crying “I am a victim, I am a victim,” bellowed at the end:

“I may not have been able to break through the glass ceiling last night, but we sure made a crack in it.”

Unable to control her sniveling, she grumbled, “The next candidate in my shoes will crash right through it.”

Will a grownup kindly inform Ms. Greuel that even dead candidates draw votes.

What is the big deal, especially since she lost by a ton?

Except for the black community, that sadly fell massively for her lies about in the last weeks about Mr. Garcetti and Dep. Mayor-presumptive Kevin James, Ms. Greuel did not fool many clusters of voters.