[img]139|left|||no_popup[/img] I hate the phrase, “everything in moderation.” I can think of lots of things not good in moderation: Slavery, not so good in moderation; War, not so good in moderation; Arsenic, not good in moderation, either.
For some reason (though likely due to the echo chamber I exist in), I have been fascinated by the idea of school food for the last year. It started with reading a blog, Fed Up with Lunch, by a speech pathologist who ate cafeteria food in the Chicago school district for a full year. She posted nearly every school day and took pictures, the most disgusting thing I’d seen in a long time. First, every “food” had a zillion ingredients. Second, everything came excessively packaged, before it was microwaved in that same cellophane. Third, it looked gross. I will refrain from taking on the moral dilemma of feeding children who are hungry crap food. You can read Janet Poppendieck’s Free for All and decide for yourself. I can’t make that Hobson’s choice.
Although I haven’t written about it in detail (and I won’t today), I’m a bit of a healthy food zealot. Where I fall on the spectrum of what’s healthy does not meet up with conventional wisdom or the USDA. I have three words for you: Weston A. Price. Naturally, that zealotry has extended to my two-year-old son. He’s not in school, so, fortunately I don’t have to address the issue of school food. I am in (almost) complete control of everything that passes his lips. School food isn’t a reality for me, and may never be, but the thought of it horrifies me.
This Is a Scandal
It was not without horror that I read the accounts of the “chicken nugget” scandal. If you’re a reader of the mommy blogs – which I would advise against –you likely saw the blogosphere light up with the story of a four-year-old North Carolina preschooler whose homemade lunch of a turkey and cheese sandwich, banana, apple juice and potato chips was supplemented or substituted (depending on your interpretation) by USDA guideline-meeting chicken nuggets. Yes, mom was charged a $1.25 for the privilege of her daughter eating a few nuggets.
As a person who thinks, at least half of the time, we need more government not less, this imposition is a horror show. Even given the kindest spin, someone is inspecting home lunches and making her own determination about what children should eat. Would I feed my son that lunch? Probably not. But that mom’s right to feed her daughter that particular lunch should be protected.
What we eat is a personal issue, and in my mind quite sacrosanct. In addition to the fundamental nature of nutrition – we are what we eat – food is so closely aligned with culture, family and tradition, that the idea a random state administrator could alter those choices is horrifying.
What other people want to foist on our kids seems to have no end. If it’s not the USDA, then it’s other parents. For years, mommy bloggers and just plain moms have debated over treats in the classrooms. Not a week goes by that I don’t read something about the absurdly named “cupcake wars.” If you’re unfamiliar – here’s how it goes: Some classrooms allow children to have treats for their birthdays. I was never in one of these classrooms in any of the schools I attended, so I can’t speak of this personally. By all accounts, what seems to happen is that the birthday child’s mother brings cupcakes for the whole class. School time is spent consuming these cupcakes. For various reasons, allergies and obesity among them, schools have started banning cupcakes in the classrooms.
Like every stupid tradition (U.S. Constitution, anyone), parents have come out in full force to defend it. It’s tradition. It’s a precious memory my child needs to celebrate with his peers. They never seem to feel bad feeding crap to your children. The excuse? Everything is okay in moderation.
Time to Call a Halt
But it’s not. Most school chicken nuggets have at least a zillion ingredients. Okay, I exaggerate. Maybe they have thirty-five. Modified corn starch, soy, beef extract and maltodextrin – among other things – are not something I’d want any human to have in moderation. The same goes for cupcakes. I’m not against cake, and I’m not against most traditions. Just the last two weekends I let my son sing happy birthday and consume cake. But it was my choice. I was there to be his “judgment,” and he ate confections. But I also know he’s not likely to eat cake for another whole year. The birthdays for the February 2010 babies from my mommy groups are all done, and so is the cake. I don’t have to worry about every neighborhood parent running down to the local grocery and bringing a sugar, corn syrup and white flour treat right to his preschool desk.
Other than pro-life advocates, I don’t know when it was decided that other adults could substitute their judgment for my own – and I wasn’t to be offended because it was only a little treat, or a little juice, or a little candy. No matter the rationale, schools shutting down the treat buffet can’t be a bad thing. By the time my child gets to school, I hope to be free of others’ judgment at least when it comes to food. Let’s extend that to all fronts and keep food-based celebrations at home where they belong. And for the state officials inspecting food lunch? God save us all if this is the best thing we can think to do with dwindling school budgets’ time and money.
Jessica Gadsden has been controversial since the day she discovered her inner soapbox. She excoriated the cheerleaders on the editorial page of her high school paper, transferred from a co-educational university to a women's college to protest the gender-biased curfew policy, published a newspaper in law school that raked the dean over the coals with (among other things) the headline, “Law School Supports Drug Use”—and that was before she got serious about speaking out. Progressive doesn't begin to define her political views. A reformed lawyer, she is a fulltime novelist who writes under a pseudonym, of course. A Brooklyn native, she divided her college years between Hampton University and Smith.
Ms. Gadsden’s essays appear every other Tuesday. She may be contacted at www.pennermag.com
