[img]396|left|Alex Campbell||no_popup[/img] I have a terrible sense of direction; I couldn’t find my way out of a paper bag.
I grew up in New York City, where the streets are mapped out on a grid. When I’m in New York, I step out of the subway station and start walking. If I need to go uptown and the street numbers are getting bigger, I know I’m going the right way. If not, I just turn around.
When I’m not in New York City, it’s more of a challenge. I work with landmarks, and give great directions: “Walk till you get to the supermarket, then turn left. Go towards the Chinese food place and past the gas station. My house is the one with the antique shopping cart on the porch.”
I know I should pay more attention to street names, but I prefer to look at things that are more visually interesting.
The one place I never got lost in was Tokyo, Japan. I thought I had entered some fantasy world where everything made sense. Because I can’t read Japanese, I was forced to rely on my eyes and memory.
Take Tea and See Some Cake
Tokyo was heaven to me. I’d get off the train, head towards the station bakery, go through the gates, stop at the Hachiko dog statue to people-watch, then go from there. Next time you’re in the Shibuya section of Tokyo, let me know, I’ll be your guide. I’ll walk you to KFC, Tower Records, a cute little stationery store, or a European boutique.
Want to eat cake that tastes like tea? Have a pizza with corn and mayonnaise on it? Find a book written in English? You may have to walk a bit and take an elevator, but I can get you there.
Geography never has been important to me. It’s only a problem whenever I go on a trip and people ask me where I’m going.
Since I don’t drive, I don’t pay much attention. For local jaunts, my standard answer is that a car is a magical machine. You get in, talk to your friend (who’s driving), mess with the radio stations, and in a couple of hours, you’re in a new place!
I went away for a weekend once, and someone asked me where I went. I said I thought it was Maine. Later, I found out it was in western Massachusetts, the state in which I live. Oops.
How Do You Read a Map?
Whenever someone hands me a map, I remark at how pretty it is. Look at all the colors and lines! Maps make great wrapping paper. Don’t ever ask me to read a map, however. I just don’t get the “bird’s eye view” thing.
I am amazed that someone can be standing someplace and know where North, South, East, and West are. My friend Amy has tried to help me with this particular issue for years. She starts by asking, “Okay, which way does the sun set?” I think it sets in the west. Therefore, I know it rises in the east. I get a mental picture of a map of the United States, and I know the directions on that; North is up, South is down, East is to the right, and West is to the left. Right?
So if I’m standing here, and the sun is over there, then I must be facing…wait a minute. If the sun is in the middle of the sky, how am I supposed to know where it’s going to go when it sets? It could have come from either direction! And how is this relevant to my everyday life?
Since I don’t drive, I don’t need to follow directions North, South, or otherwise. I know it’s supposed to be helpful when you’re buying a house. “The kitchen has a southern exposure, so lots of light comes in during the day…” or whatever. Well, I’m not buying a house.
It Was Fascinating, but…
I used to be really into Feng Shui. I’d get books out of the library and pore over them. The concept of bringing health and happiness to one’s life simply by arranging the furniture a certain way is fascinating to me. As I learned more about it, however, I realized that Feng Shui was best left up to the experts.
I’d probably bring ill fortune and sickness to my life because my bed wasn’t facing in the right direction. Is that why I’m still single?
Listen, I may not be able to tell you that Culver City, California, is west of Los Angeles (and I don’t really know if it is), but if you want to take a road trip, I’ll pay for half the gas and entertain the kids. Just make sure you have a GPS.
Ms. Campbell may be contacted at campbellalexandra@hotmail.com
