A 43-year-old woman asked me to resolve several matters on her life, starting with her apparent memory of having been abused as a child. It was a therapist she had been seeing for a year who suggested she had been abused. She had not. The therapist unfortunately was among those who believe all issues stem from childhood. Concluding her reactions to relationships were not normal, he leaped wrongly.
The client refused to accept his diagnosis. She had no such recollection. Never beaten by her parents, she was always encouraged. As a successful business woman, her parents would have been proud today.
Stubbornly, her therapist was insistent about his conclusion.
Here is a classic case of a therapist not accepting what a client told him.
After so much useless therapy, the woman came to see me because she had heard hypnosis created quick results.
She explained that she was shy, did not like being the center of attention. However, when asked to deliver a presentation for work, she responded swiftly and excelled.
She suspected something was wrong because her friends were more animated, more people-oriented than she was.
Overseas, they have the impression Americans are brash, loud, obnoxious. Many Americans hold a similar view, minus the obnoxious. They feel something is wrong if they are not outgoing.
It took a while, but the woman understood that her thinking was erroneous. Once she understood the kind of person she is, it would help her accept hereself.
I have mentioned before the differences between Physical and Emotional behaviors. The Physical is outgoing, loves people, to do things with other people, attends to family first, people activities second, work third. Emotionals are the opposite, preferring work, individual activities, family in that order.
My young lady client did not realize her behaviors were not wrong, just different. Once she understood this and the immutable law of nature, that opposites attract, she began to see why she was drawing louder, outgoing people. As an Emotional she was going to attract a Physical.
We learn our behaviors during the first 12 years from our secondary caretaker, usually the father. For my client, her father was a high Emotional. She learned how to be shy from her father.
By now, she was observing others from the Physical and Emotional perspectives. Her life changed for the better. No longer nervous and shy, she started making small attempts to be outgoing. Soon she was successful. As she came to understand people better, she would ask questions of people she had just met, curious to learn whether she was talking to a Physical or an Emotional.
Combined with hypnosis, these insights provided her with great self-esteem. Within weeks, she not only was much better but knew she never had been abused.
Do not hesitate to contact me by telephone, 310.204.3321, or by email at nickpollak@hypnotherapy4you.net. See my website at www.hypnotherapy4you.net
