On the eve of Christmas, in the glowing spirit of the powerful religious faith that is the foundation of this most sacred of days for Christians, we share the story of one father’s horribly lonely but rewarding journey.
His name is T. Eagle, a schooldays chum of mine, a giant of a man of unshakable faith.
Not once but twice he has journeyed, alone necessarily, from the depths of mourning the tragic death of a family member to the ecstatic, faith-driven heights of reasonably full recovery, following the mandatory passage of time.
He married his high school sweetheart Pat, and they had four children. Shortly before her 40th birthday, his wife died of ovarian cancer. Years later, tragedy paid a return visit. He lost his son, Mark Chrowl, when he was 45 years old, and it is Mark’s story we tell today.
On March 17, ’05, the grieving father relayed the news in a poignant email:
“Hi friends & family:
“We are home from Florida where we lifted you-all up in our thoughts and prayers from many campgrounds.
“We had to leave a few days early as Mark had a massive aneurysm to his brain on Saturday, March 12. His last three days were spent at a hospice where family could stay with him around the clock.
“I am asking you for prayers for Carletta [his wife] and our families.
“Mark is now in heaven with his mother.
“As always, with much love and prayers. Be good to each other. Keep smiling and dancing.”
Health problems long had dogged Mark, as he indicated in a speech he gave at his high school graduation in 1978:
“It was once said that good friends, as well as good health, are not appreciated until you lose them. I know this quite well. For it was in my recent illness that I learned the value of each.
“Friendship, to me, is invaluable. How can one place a value on a card, a prayer, a visit, or just a warm smile. You don’t know how fantastic it made me feel when the football team presented me with their game ball. Let me tell you, this sort of kindness was far better for my health than any radiation treatment.
“Friendship does not stop after high school. And I hope this talk inspires you to enlarge your circle of friends after graduation. Always remember, make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, the other gold.
“It was knowing that I had many friends pulling for me that gave me strength to fight my battle and win.
“My glory seemed short-lived though. As most of you know, my mother became very ill shortly after I got home.
“It was a very painful period for our family. But good friends helped us through this trying time. They even took turns in bringing us supper.
“This may not sound like much, but, you would not believe how happy this made us, especially mom. She said that they could not have done anything nicer, and you know, I think she was right.
“My dad has always held friendship in the highest regard. He has always believed in expressing his feelings concerning friendship. I would like to share with you the following thoughts that he expressed to me this past Christmas.
“‘Mark,’ he said, ‘you have just finished the first quarter of your game of life, and the last few minutes have been really tough. But God has given you the faith, the strength and the good friends to be leading.
“‘Now with God and with friends, you are going to make plans for a winning game. You have always marched to a good drummer. So sing your song, dream your dreams, and pray your prayer.
“‘Make all the friends you can for as you touch them during the game, you will leave your ‘mark’ and be touched a thousand times more in return.
“‘May you always have God as your coach, and many friends as your teammates. And may your score be 100 percent happiness. With lots of love, your Dad and friend.’
“We are all leaving each other in body, but never in spirit. Remember, time goes on and makes its changes. But some things remain the same, memories with thoughts and fancies that stay with us forever.
“In the days and the years to come, none will be more sincere and true, than the thoughts and the warm wishes I hold for dear friends like you. Thank you and may God bless you always.”
Mark’s father recently appended the following note to me:
“The next two and a half quarters for Mark were wonderful. He found Carletta, and they LOVED and
played together as a great team.
“Then the last few minutes of their game got really tough again. But Carletta did an awesome job of blocking and carrying the ball. Now Mark is playing a new game with God, and we are all winners for having known Mark.”
You may contact Mark’s extraordinary father at teagle35@comcast.net
