John Cohn

For the nearly two billion people who mark their calendars by the phases of the moon, midnight ushered in the beginning of the 15-day New Year’s celebration.

According to the Chinese Zodiac – which is pegged to Jupiter’s nearly 12-year orbit around the sun – 2009 is the Year of the Ox.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

The plight of lobbyists in Washington is definitely a tale of two cities.

It may be a new day for American politics, but it’s the same old story with economy, and this time it’s pretty ugly.

In only his second full day in office, Mr. Obama has been hit with news that U.S. builders broke ground in December on the fewest houses since record-keeping began, as sales and credit dried up, signaling the real-estate slump will keep hurting economic growth.

Spark up the espresso machine.

Break out the Red Bull.

Pack the kids off to school.

Aunt Madge and Uncle Fred have gone back to the farm.

Send your tux to the cleaners and let Michelle sleep in.

The last guy left the joint a shambles.

To say that the inauguration of Barack Obama as the 44th President of the United States is momentous understates its historic significance.

Whether you voted for Mr. Obama or not, your chest should have swelled with American pride as you watched him take the oath of office.

George W. Bush took his final walk through the storied White House Portico and then handed the reins of power to Barack Obama, America’s 44th President.

Shortly after this sublime yet poignant moment, the former President and First Lady were to cross the South Lawn to board Marine One on the first leg of their return to private life and Crawford, TX.

Most stores have a 30-day merchandise return policy.

Even if you bring back the item within a month of purchase, in most instances, you’ll only get a store credit.

It’s an American tradition, a birthright even.

All red-blooded American taxpayers try to beat the IRS just so they can hang on to their dignity.

Admit it. We all do it. And if we can’t, we’d sure like to.

As Barack Obama gets set to place his hand on the bible next Tuesday, third and fourth grade classes all across American have already started writing letters to the new leader of the free world.

Why should they be the only ones giving their ideas to the new President?

I thought I’d get in on the excitement.

I know what you’re asking yourself. Who’s Ted? Why should I care?

Ted is not so much a who but, rather, a what.

The Ted Spread is the difference between the London interbank offered rate, or Libor, that banks say they charge each other for three-month loans in dollars and the yield on the three-month Treasury bill. Any narrowing of this spread is a positive indication that the credit markets are beginning to thaw.