When you have the media unanimously behind you, sounding like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir as menopause strikes, even if you are as incompetent as Swish Obama, you can achieve darned near any objective you set.
By the fortunate confluence of magic, wizardry, witchcraft and standard Democrat dishonesty, we learned at the weekend — just when Swish was losing all but the slowest Americans — that the Steve Jobs news was stunningly encouraging.
The New York Times, the Washington Post and the Los Angeles Titanic acknowledged in a single sentence in Saturday’s editions that the supposedly good Steve Jobs news on Friday was a fraud. They immediately returned to their unrelieved Obama boosterism and mockery of all matters Republican.
He’s Really, Really Our Guy
Our liberal betters told us that American unemployment plummeted last month from 9.2 percent to 9.1 percent. The Angry Left’s media huzzahed on Friday, Saturday and Sunday — whatta guy da brilliant Prez is, singlehandedly reviving the moribund economy that President Bush tried to kill.
Just last Thursday night, Swishy was slushing barefoot through the Rose Garden in his latest national spectacle birthday bash to himself. Deftly, he buttonholed a parade of high-on-something celebrities, asking in a staged whisper if they had any ideas for creating jobs.
When a guy is trying to get re-elected — King Swishy had the decency to stave off his re-election campaign until the day after he was voted in the first time — he can’t be wasting his precious energy worrying about those “poor and middle-class” workers. he keeps touting.
Truth Sneaks Through
The uglier truth about the Steve Jobs report is that even though the “official” percentage of unemployed dipped, fewer people are working today than a month ago.
This sounds like a mystery for Assad’s Syria — slaughter ‘em when you need to thin out the population, lazarus them when you need to raise the number.
Here is what happened:
One hundred and twenty thousand discouraged workers — probably lazy Republicans — dropped out of the workforce. The government, in its quaking wisdom, made an executive decision to stop counting them. A miniscule 117,000 jobs were created in July. When those new jobs are factored into a thinned out potential workforce, the number of unemployed welfare recipients drops.
From people smarter than I, especially patterico.com, National Review’s Jim Geraghty and bloomberg.com, we learn:
• The share of the eligible population holding a job declined to 58.1 percent, the lowest since July 1983.
• Said Mr. Geraghty on his Twitter account: “Since January 2009, Obama’s policies have successfully lowered unemployment by driving 3,566,000 Americans from the work force.”
Go, Swish.
• Patterico adds: “In the household survey over the last three months alone, the labor force is down 500K, the number of employed is down 500K, and the numbe ofr unemployed is unchanged. If the active labor force were as big as it was when President Obama took office, the unemployment rate would be 11.7 percent. Also, average weekly hours worked for all employees were flat at 34.3 hours, essentially the same as a year ago. Plus, temporary help, usually a precursor of future hiring, added 0 jobs in July.
• “Friday’s report may help avert a meltdown in the markets, which is something. However, by every standard Obama listed in his megalomaniacal speech about slowing the rise of the oceans, the United States is either stagnant or worse off than in 2008.
• “Indeed, according to White House press flack Jay Carney: ‘The White House doesn’t create jobs.’”
While plumbing sources here and across the country, with my left hand I dialed a separate set of experts. All of them confirmed that contrary to a report last week, the poor did not create any jobs last month. They spent the 31 days of July at King Swish’s back door, begging for stale apple pie. Once served, they sped away in gleaming late-model cars, nearly jolting their laptops off the back seat while rushing home to cash their food stamps.
Thank you, Swishy.