Home OP-ED Leaving Breaks My Heart, but My Home Is Calling Home

Leaving Breaks My Heart, but My Home Is Calling Home

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[img]96|left|Shachar||no_popup[/img]Dateline Jerusalem — I am still in the states, but G-d willing hope to return “home” next week. I say “home” because although I am still a U.S. citizen, from the first time I stepped off the plne and touched ground on a visit to Israel over 30 years ago, I felt like I was “home.” The goosebumps on my arms and shivers that go from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet made me feel that way. They still make me feel that way. And everyone I know seems to have the same reaction. The home of my ancestors is my home today, my home for the last three years.

I have spoken to people of many religions and sects here in the states. Some have told me that they have heard that if they visit Israel they will not want to return to their homes in America. I agree. Something is magical about being there. Something is in the air, a calmness, the feeling of G-d's presence at all times, the living of history. It is an unbelievably special place. Those who never would consider moving to Israel often cannot help returning there time after time for a visit.

I must admit my trip to the states has reminded me of many things I miss in Israel. It is so nice to have closets to hang clothes, large rooms that fit king-sized beds and furniture, private unattached homes, wall-to-wall carpeting throughout a house, dryers in every home so that no clothes hang from outside lines or clothes racks, garbage disposals to grind food, the convenience of drive-up banking, albacore tuna, glatt kosher teriyaki beef jerky, and fantastic prices. Believe it or not, even glatt kosher food seems to be more in abundance in California than in Israel. I kept saying my entire trip, “I can't get that in Israel!”

However, there are things about Israel that I miss here in America. I miss the safety and freedom of walking home alone in the middle of the night without fear of molestation or rape. I miss the security and knowledge that violent and major crimes are almost non-existent. I miss the convenience of home deliveries of everything from food to large screen TVs I miss the excellent public transportation via bus and train. I miss pita sandwiches of falafel balls and fried eggplant slices with hummus and tehina, Israeli chopped salad, and french fries for less than $2 at a kiosk in my neighborhood. I miss shaved slices of lamb or turkey shwarma roasting on a spit.

How Much I Miss

I miss the friendliness and hospitality of absolute strangers inviting me for lunch or dinner at their homes after meeting them only once on a train, bus or walking on the street. I miss the beauty of the country, from its pristine white beaches and clear blue water, its mountain and deserts with flora and fauna seen only in Israel, to the beauty of its people who have come from all over the world to escape oppression, annihilation, exile, or who come to embrace G-d whose presence it felt at all times.

I am going to miss all my family and friends who have made my visit to the states so memorable. My non-religious family has had to adjust to my kosher way of life during my visit. I appreciate my son-in-law and daughter's efforts in transforming their home for me. Even my granddaughter has become cognizant of the changes to her household, from what foods can be eaten to what appliances and utensils can be used. One day my daughter was cleaning the bathroom and started to use a toilet cleanser. My 5-year-old granddaughter screamed “Mom, stop! Is that kosher?!!” We couldn't stop laughing.

Of course, my granddaughter also has had to get used to the many looks of her grandmother. She has seen me for a few minutes without a head covering, with my hair longer than hers reaching a couple of inches above my waist. But around her house I wore a knit cap or snood or scarf covering my hair. Because my son and two daughters think I look in my 70s or 80s with those head coverings, I brought my brownish red sheitel (wig) with me to wear in public. Then one day I picked up my granddaughter from kindergarten with a short blond stylish sheitel, as my daughter decided it makes me look 20 years younger and goes well with my blue eyes and light coloring. My poor confused granddaughter.

It has been a wonderful visit, and it breaks my heart to say goodbye, but Israel is calling me home.


L'hitraot. Shachar (Dawn)