Home OP-ED The Many Faces of Whacky Wendy, Non-Baseball Fan

The Many Faces of Whacky Wendy, Non-Baseball Fan

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[img]1670|right|Ms. Wendy Gruel||no_popup[/img]Wendy (Vote for Me ‘Cause I Am a Girl, Albeit a Pretty Mature One) Greuel is the only public figure I know who has spent less time in the black community than Swish Obama.

She thinks grits is something you do when you clench more than one tooth.

My favorite Swiftless Wendy story happened a few weeks ago in South Los Angeles.

She was fluffed up to introduce Magic Johnson as the newest celebrity supporter of her campaign to become mayor of Los Angeles in the May 21 runoff election.

Her handlers, cramming as they were, told the slightly slow minded one that Mr. Johnson had been a star with the champion Lakers through the 1980s, but that today he was a minority owner of the Dodgers.

As a mechanical thinker, Ms. Greuel, unsure whether a baseball is round or oblong, could only remember the Dodger part.

Witlessly, she strode to the microphone like a cartoonish Valley girl and burbled how much she had loved watching Mr. Johnson play baseball when she was a little girl. He was her baseball hero.

As foes and friends of Whacky have learned in the last year and a half of her whorish campaign that her feelings are liquid, her commitments are slimed with grease, and the word of a streetwalker is more reliable.

It is being recognized widely around Los Angeles that Dakota Smith of the Daily News is doing the finest reporting work on the city campaigns – the unmotivated boy and girl slugs at the Los Angeles Titanic can’t touch her.

Ms. Smith reported yesterday how two-faced the slovenly Ms. Greuel is.

After Kevin James finished an impressive but out-of-the-money third place in the March 5 primary, she and Eric Garcetti immediately began ferociously courting Mr. James to win his backers and their votes for the expected tight showdown.

In emails, Ms. Greuel batted her baby blues and swung her blonde hair at Mr. James via email, Ms. Smith reported yesterday:

“U are beloved – I hear it alot(sic),” Ms. Greuel, a former Republican messaged the man now the city’s most prominent Republican pol.

Seeking to seduce, Ms. Greuel included smiley faces and winking emoticons.

Ms. Smith further reported:

Ms. Greuel fired off such friendly, palsy-walsy messages as:

“How is your day looking? I am ready, able and willing.”

“Thanks again for Friday night – we could have talked for hours! I need your advice on something when u have a moment – good time to chat?”

After missing Mr. James at a meeting in the Valley, she vowed to keep trying to reach him because “I am stalking you.”

Mr. James endorsed Mr. Garcetti, a sound strategy.

Ever the chameleon, Ms. Greuel’s latest attack mailer, Ms. Smith notes, “includes quotes about James from others calling him ‘a divisive right-ring Republican radio host who compared Barack Obama to a Nazi sympathizer on nation T.V.’”

Ms. Greuel’s campaign belittles Mr. James for “radical, extremist” and “racist” remarks – especially, or only, because he endorsed her opponent.

This does not include the numerous contract promises she has made with DWP union thugs during their pillow talk sessions.

Otherwise, she is the Virgin Wendy, or whatever you want her to be. Just don’t ask her to make it a permanent commitment. Diamonds are forever. Wendy is not a gem, or even a gemologist.

Just this morning, the Daily News, evidently unsure of the meaning of duplicity, endorsed Ms. Greuel.

Maybe they don’t read the newspapers.