A transition is taking place this New Year, and I expect it to be a happy one.
After 25 years with LAUSD, my wife is retiring.
She will continue to go to her favorite activities, such as yoga, and the gym. She will expand her horizons and find other things to do. I am happy for her.
While she is doing her activities, I will be doing my favorite pastimes, working on the computer, making pop-up cards, and ice creams.
When we are together, I expect we will often take day trips to explore new places. I look forward to using my TreeMapLA app, logging in interesting trees.
When we are together, I expect we will organize in the house together. One of our mutual organizing goals is to take down a box at a time from the attic, go through the stuff, and try to throw or give away as much as possible.
When we are together, I expect we will prepare and eat lovely meals together.
My wife and I acknowledge that she is often is the idea person. I am the one who carries things out. It works pretty well. For example, our refrigerator’s freezer was accumulating snow. Our icemaker stopped working. My wife suggested I call about the warranty. I called, adjusted the warranty period, and this morning a technician came and solved the problem.
I believe my wife and I need to be positive with each other, especially now that we will be home together more often. On the one hand, we need to adjust our schedules to accommodate each other somewhat and, on the other hand, we need to be “lovingly firm” about our feelings and identified needs.
For example, let's assume my wife says she's going shopping at the mall for a couple of hours, and I would like to make a pop-up card during that time. If she says that she would like me to fix the chairs while she is shopping, I have to be able to say something like “I will fix the chairs at such and such a time, because at this time, while you are shopping, I want to make a pop-up card.”
I hope this a works smoothly. I think we can do it. Key is to communicate lovingly with each other so that conflicts can be resolved, and hugs soon will follow.
Mr. Ebsen may be contacted at robertebsen@hotmail.com
