I received a call from the husband of a lady engulfed in extreme guilt and depression over the death of her 21-year-old daughter.
The young woman committed suicide 13 months ago, and her mother had discovered the body. Convinced she should have done more to assist her daughter, she had lost her best friend.
The mother’s husband, who is not the father, worried for his wife. Her unrelenting. nagging guilt and depression were affecting their relationship. He was unsure of the marriage’s future.
The woman was in deep mourning with no sign of ending.
I knew, though, hypnosis could help her. First I had to determine where she was among the recognized five stages of grief.
1) Denial and isolation.
2) Anger.
3) Bargaining.
4) Depression.
5) Acceptance.
She had reached the next to last stage, acceptance.
Shades of Depression
Two types of depression are associated with mourning. First is a reaction to practical implications relating to the loss. Sadness and regret are dominant. The mother fretted about the costs and burial of her daughter. In her grief, she feared she had spent too little time with others who depend on her. This phase was eased by clarification, reassurance — and hypnosis.
Sometimes all we may need are helpful cooperation and kind words.
The second type of depression is more subtle, more private: Our quiet preparation to separate and bid our loved one farewell. Sometimes all we really need is a hug.
To help her with this was a two-step process. First was to eat more regularly and to ensure that it was protein-rich. This would ensure well-maintained blood sugar levels. That helps a person pursuing more stable moods, greater energy and an ability to think unemotionally. The second: To begin a desensitization process to heal the image and feelings when she had found her daughter’s body.
Her depression eased by stages. She became more aware of her surroundings, those who loved her. She felt better at her job. Steadily she improved.
A general rule regarding death:
Every year you have known the person, requires a month of grieving.
She knew she needed to move. Not to forget her daughter, but remember her in a more positive way, and to release herself from the chains of inappropriate guilt she had been experiencing.
Do not hesitate to contact me by telephone, 310.204.3321, or by email at nickpollak@hypnotherapy4you.net. See my website at www.hypnotherapy4you.net
