Numbed almost into a catatonic state, I sit here this morning in ice-bound shock.
It is psychologically destructive to swallow the unpalatable news that yet another sunny Southern gentleman so obscenely quenched his thirst for religious thrills.
Who among us can believe that yet another trashy Muslim named Mohammed could have deliberately slayed four unarmed (!) U.S. Marines yesterday in Chattanooga, busting yet another President Obama vow.
How unusual.
Our father Barack, who art in Washington on his way to heaven. Thank God.
The oddity of it all. Just because 99.9 percent of all heinous terrorism acts throughout America and the world in the last 22 years have been committed by religion-crazed Muslims, that is no reason, to quote Mr. Obama, to publicly deploy the phrase “Islamic terrorist.” That is a libel against an honorable, innocent people, we were told.
Savage Islamic terrorism?
Balderdash.
These decades of hideous crimes, especially the beheadings, merely are random acts of Islamic unkindness.
Christian and Jewish boys seeking kill-thrills better start now if they hope to catch up to their dearly beloved Muslim brothers.
Six years ago, a fine American gentleman with the good-ol- boy down-home name of Nidal Malik Hassan, fueled by an overdose of Islam, rampaged across Ft. Hood in Texas. He murdered 13 military heroes. You, Mr. President, in your infinite Islamic wisdom, said it was not a crime by a Muslim terrorist. It was “workplace violence.”
Ah, and here I thought an illustration of “workplace violence” was when my vastly overweight editor at the old Evening Outlook in Santa Monica during the 1980s threw his daily tantrum. He would kick a wastebasket across the room, his slipper would come off, and he would be too fat to bend over and retrieve it.
One month ago, speaking as the face of the untethered Left after a dumb white kid in South Carolina slaughtered 9 black persons while they were studying in church, Mr. Obama assured us normal Americans that the unreconstructed South should be sliced off and shoved out to sea, never to return.
You, Mr. President, possibly reaching back for a favorite Saturday Night Live skit, said that the presence of a Confederate flag made the kid do the dirty deed. You, in your unique wisdom, said Confederate bodies should be dug up and eventually reburied someplace where no respectable people would go.
Mr. Obama, you said Dixie was crammed with red-necked, white-skinned bigots all named Billy Bob, beneficiaries of white privilege. You said those darned right-wing extremists who have killed 1 or 2 Americans this century, they are the true terrorists in this country, not the Muslim animals who have murdered hundreds of thousands.
You said these occasional Muslims just happened to need to cure their boredom.
The right-wing are the dastardly boys who need to be wiped out before they make us disappear.
Sweeping Under the …What?
By the way, Mr. President, there’s a delivery man at the door. Says he has the prayer rugs you secretively ordered. Shall I usher him in?