Home OP-ED A Marriage Made in — Happy Places

A Marriage Made in — Happy Places

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Dateline DaytonAs promised in an earlier essay, here is the first installment of our 48 years of marriage.

After our honeymoon, I returned to work at the accounting firm. Pauline became a stay-at-home wife. I came home for lunch as often as I could so Pauline would have company during the day. Due to a shortage of funds, our entertainment consisted of television, ice cream and visiting parents on weekends. None of our close friends was married yet so we didn’t socialize often with them.

Since I was working for a CPA firm, once tax season started, I had to work seven days a week, which was difficult for Pauline. As crunch time was approaching at work, Pauline learned she was pregnant, and it wasn’t an easy pregnancy. Most of the time, she was sick, not just morning sickness but 24 hours a day. Finally her doctor found a medication that helped.

Darlene was born Sept. 17, 1963. I remember the evening well. When I came home from work, I told Pauline I didn’t feel well. Just soup and crackers for supper. Later that night, she announced “it’s time.” The hospital was a short drive from our apartment, and thankfully I was feeling better. Maybe not feeling well was a sign, which I didn’t recognize.

We arrived at the hospital, got signed in and went to a room. I was allowed to stay with her for a short time and then had to spend the rest of the night in the waiting area for fathers. Fortunately the lady at the reception desk was related to a neighbor across the street from my family home in Piqua, so I had someone to talk with. A little before 7 the next morning, Darlene arrived, a beautiful, healthy girl, and mother was doing fine.

We had a lovely small room in our apartment for her, and we continued to live there until we purchased our first home. The lady who owned the duplex along with her husband lived next door. She helped us with Darlene’s laundry until we could purchase a washer and later a dryer.

In April of 1964, we bought our first home for the grand sum of $12,500 from the daughters of the family that had lived there since it was built. Now they were moving to the Dayton suburb of Kettering. Being just the second family to occupy the home, it was in great shape, on a nice street, with super neighbors. Next door lived the Doyles, a retired couple, with no children. They also had lived in their home from the time it was built. Mr. Doyle was a handy person, and he was always working on his house or in the garage. This put pressure on me to keep our place looking nice. The Moores lived across the street, and Darlene really liked them.

Pauline’s father, who had been unable to work for years due to a stroke, developed cancer. Pauline and Darlene would travel to Piqua three times a week to allow her mother to continue to work and care for her dad. This took a toll on Pauline. Her dad died in October of 1964.

On July 7, 1966, after one false alarm, our son Christopher was born. Although Pauline did better this time, she still had problems with morning sickness. By now, some friends were married, but they didn’t have children. We spent our free time working on the house and visiting our parents on weekends.

Less than a year later, June 23, 1967, our third child, a daughter, Lisa, was born, a very quick birth. Pauline was embarrassed by the false alarm with Chris, so she waited too long this time. I had to sign her in while she was being rushed to delivery. By the time I got the paperwork completed, it was close to being over.

Back home, life continued as before. I was still working for the CPA firm. Since the death of Pauline’s father, her mother would occasionally come to Dayton and babysit for us, giving us the chance to get out once in a while.

In 1968, I left the accounting firm and went to work as the office manager for a tool & die shop. The president of the company was the owner of the apartment we rented before buying our home. I had been asked a year earlier to join the company but turned them down. Since I was being asked again, I thought it was time for a change. This was not an easy decision.

I continued doing tax work on my own, which I still do, while working for one of the accountants I had worked with at the CPA firm, who started his own accounting firm. When he moved his firm to Florida, my extra work ended.

On Sept. 23, 1969, we were blessed with our fourth child, Bill.

The owner of the tool and die shop had a home in Florida, which we had the opportunity to use on a couple occasions. These were special trips for us, affording us the only time we were able to get away as a family. One time we took my sister to help with the children and give her an opportunity to take a vacation.

On Christmas Day 1973, our fifth child, a son, Jonathan was born. Previously I told you about the events of that day, so I won’t bore you again with the details.

In August of 1974 we purchased a larger home, a few blocks north of our current home. It was a nice and big, but we sure missed the great neighbors we had on Parkwood. Mrs. Doyle had died and Mr. Doyle sold his house to a couple our age. We enjoyed playing cards and working on various project together.

I joined Kiwanis and became active in various neighbor organizations.

In 1976 the tool and die shop went out of business. Happily, though, the previous owner had a company, and I immediately went to work at his place. The business was in Kettering, and we started looking for a home south of town. We were looking forward to leaving Maplewood because most neighbors were not friendly. At times, they were nasty.

In 1976, there was one other memorable event. Pauline and I attended a Marriage Encounter Weekend. This was truly an uplifting experience for our marriage, which we can recommend to all couples, no matter how many years you have been together. We were active for a number of years in the Marriage Encounter movement, and we met many new friends.

Next, 33 years in Kettering.

Before You Go

Footnote to last week’s essay on dairies in my hometown. In last Sunday’s issue of Parade magazine, there is a story on two brothers who, after nearly 50 years, resumed the milk route business of their grandfather and father. Go to Parade.to/milkman

Mr. Hennessey may be contacted at pmhenn@sbcglobal.net