Extremists on the Los Angeles City Council carelessly placed both of their bare feet in a bowl of steaming molasses several weeks ago when they pulled second-hand paper bags over their heads and voted not to do business with the disgusting state of Arizona until or unless the entertainer Madonna officially were declared a virgin. Again.
Hardly any sight in political life is funnier than watching a parroting chorus of xeroxed liberal men leaping out of their politically correct seats, flailing their politically correct arms in a politically approved direction, speaking out in pig Latin and other tongues against Arizona’s anti-illegal immigrant law.
Which is what the City Council did a few weeks ago, so worried were they about their illegal Mexican constituents turning against the Democrat Party.
President Obama, lately downgraded from Messiah to Mess Sergeant, has been howling, incoherently, since April against the Arizona law, which he has not read. Ask him specifically what he opposes in the Arizona law, and he will tell you he played golf over the weekend. Specificity is his numbing enemy. If only he could fire Arizona as effortlessly as he fired Gen. McChrystal this afternoon, he wouldn’t have to worry about illegal Latins abandoning him in November.
If your bizarre mother ever potched you as a child only to recant five minutes later, you will understand the peculiar chore of the City Council this afternoon:
The liberal extremists were trying to simultaneously kiss both of their heels, an unappetizing thought.
Politically, that meant they were kind of, sort of, well, partially, repealing their early spring boycott declaration, “We Hate You, Arizona, and By Gum, We Never Will Do Business with You Again Unless, By Thunder, We Absolutely Have to.”
One of those “have to” moments has arrived.
The LAPD’s dreaded red light camera contract with a Scottsdale company is about to expire. With tongues extended, the LAPD was to plead with a presumably receptive Council to extend the multi-million dollar agreement 10 months. Why 10? By that time, the November elections will have passed, nobody will give a darn whether illegals vote for the Rooty Toot-Toot Party, and Mr. Obama will be traveling through the Muslim Middle East promoting a boycott of Israel.
At Your Beck and…Whatever
Then there is the sad and worsening tale of Charlie (My Wife Calls Me Chump) Beck, the politically correct chief of the LAPD for the past few painful months.
Boob (I Feel So Politically Correct Today) Beck proved himself to be as powerful as a wilted petunia last Friday. Shortly before the Council was likely — it says here — to agree to yet another exemption to the Arizona boycott, which must be constructed of pansy fabric, Chief Boob glanced over both shoulders, studied his spit-shined shoes, aimed at the Council and said, “Whoa, boys. No need to vote.”
Last week, a flap was made when it became known that four LAPD officers were scheduled to attend an annual airborne law enforcement conference in Arizona. When the Chief Boob remembered that the Council had told him only bad guys live in Arizona, Boob called off the conference flight.
In a display of something south of courage, Boob explained that the trip had been cancelled “to respect the Council’s boycott of Arizona.”
Aye, aye, sir.
Whereupon his rebellious troops signaled an emergency Boob Alert.
The police union — union guys, would you believe? — were furious with Boob. “A huge mistake,” said Paul Weber of the Los Angeles Police Protective League, speaking for its 9,600 members. “Public safety shouldn’t be sacrificed just because Arizona has become a political football.”
Darryl Gates may be churning in his recent grave at the latest wimpy wonder to succeed him.
