Home OP-ED There Really Is Something Fishy About Bassy

There Really Is Something Fishy About Bassy

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Re: “Bimbo Alert: Guess Who Is Skulking Away with Education Dollars?

Imagine the unrequited joy that streamed with a rush into my constantly unfulfilled heart this morning when I opened my favorite black weekly.

Greeting me was a lovable picture of the estimable Karen Bass posing so prettily with the dour Grandma, Slapsie Maxie Waters, who is estimated to be three years older than Los Angeles.

Maintaining its hallowed mantra — We Don’t Explain. We Just Throw It Out There for You — the Los Angeles Sentinel declined to immediately tell readers why, in its main Page 1 photo, these two Princesses of Political Purity and Perfumed, Prudent Petulance were holding hands.

To keep from belting each other, perhaps, since both have well-known tempers?

No, it develops that U.S. Rep. Maxine Waters (D- Angeles) — one half of the redoubtable South Los Angeles duo of Dumb and Dumber with Rep. Diane Watson (D-Culver City) — appearing as a member of the world’s oldest profession, was posing as the world’s oldest cheerleader.

In the scum-ridden world of South Los Angeles politics, where soap is to the natives what the Taliban is to Republicans, Ms. Waters declared her approval of the latest slimy job switch.

With a straight but crooked face, the retiring Ms. Watson unilaterally announced — as if she lived on this planet by herself – that she is turning over the seat she has held for 10 years in the House of Representatives to Ms. Bass, who is, conveniently, term-limited out of the state Assembly.

Fishy and Vision Don’t Go Together

My gollee, Hopalong, what will those church-going gals think up next?

Voters? What voters? We decided. Game over.

If you tossed all three barnyard bimbos up in the air, it would not make any difference which one landed.

Fishy is a glorified housewife. Visionless and ignorant with alley-cat morals, she is hardly ever stumped until she crawls out of bed in the morning. She challenges herself to think smaller, more insularly, every day. Gosh, how she is succeeding. Outside of misdirecting the budget process, her strongest claim appears to be a beer barrel full of foster family initiatives, which, she believes, will pull California back from the fiscal precipice.

She has no more idea how to conduct herself in a government body than she does to diagram a moon-bound rocket.

In anticipation of advancing to Congress, on Mondays and Wednesdays, Fishy takes two-hour spelling lessons so she can memorize the right way to spell W-a-s-h-i-n-g-t-o-n before she gets there.

Give Me an Easier Option

She asked about running in Fresno. Shrewdly, the good burghers of the Central Valley rejected her after she twice spelled Fresno with an “a” — instead of an “f.”

If I tell you she is an advocate for social justice, and permanent aid for foster families, you know she has no idea what the role of government should be.

Fishy Bassy, a late starter in the Crooked Ol’ Broads ‘R Us sweepstakes, made a bid to catch up with her slimier big sisters a week ago last Friday.

The date was not random. It was her final day in office as Speaker of the state Assembly.

The Sacramento Bee reported, exclusively, last Thursday that sneaky As a leading officer in a state mocked nationally for letting itself go broke, Fishy handed out 10 percent pay raises and promotions to 20 staff members. This came 11 months after the Los Angeles Times caught sneaky Fishy doing the same thing and forced her to rescind the raises.

How ironic that her latest, perhaps foulest, stunt came on the same day California schoolchildren were marching to wring unavailable dollars out of Sacramento.

The Times has not reported this latest Fishy misdeed. What a surprise.

If the Sentinel, which embraces almost any crook if he is black enough, comments on Fishy in Thursday’s edition, it likely will commend her for pumping fresh cash into the black economy.

If Fishy were not a black woman Democrat, she probably would have been scandalized out of the race for Ms. Watson’s seat in November.

But remember who her arbiters are.

Embracing the belief that Fishy is an irredeemable political whore, inattentive Democrat voters will shrug in November and mark their ballots for her.

And President Rabbit Ears wants to blow up this political system? I warned you he did not have a sense or humor.

Reading the Sentinel provides the kind of weird charge we used to get from scanning dirty books when we were kids.

In the Sentinel story by Manager Editor Yussuf J. Simmonds, he quotes Fishy as if he were an awestruck child interviewing his mother.

On the off-chance that her Sentinel interview is not appended to the Declaration of Independence, the charter of Culver City or the U.S. Constitution, tell me if these daunting words don’t rattle your bones:

“The idea that I could be back in the middle of the Obama administration with Democrats in control of Congress, is an opportunity to work on the issues that I’ve been working on the past couple of decades. (Of course [asserts Mr. Simmonds] she was referring to her role as co-chair in California for the Obama campaign in 2008.)

“It’s a time period when I believe it will be possible to make some substantive changes, for example, education reform is a big issue that is being talked about now, maybe there’ll be an opportunity to address the severe dropout rate among African American and Latino students in California; I can imagine it’s similar in other states. So, to be involved in Congress at a time when education reform is being debated; healthcare reform – although I’m sure it will pass before I win, if I’m fortunate enough to be victorious — there are many pieces of healthcare reform that will remain on the table because everything will not be taken care of in this one time period.”

Take that, Patrick Henry.