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The Perfect Panacea for the Afghan War

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Victor Davis Hanson, a brilliant professor of ancient history from Fresno, manages to wipe the fog from our vision every time he ponders a topic that confuses thinkers on the right and left.

The most tedious problem facing President Obama this afternoon is how to split the cake he badly wants to eat in Afghanistan.

Should he grant Gen. Stanley McChrystal’s request for 40,000 more troops in Afghanistan?

Last we heard, he was trying to ameliorate both of his rival audiences — liberals who think we should leave town and conservatives who say the general knows best.

Mr. Obama, said sources, wanted to walk down  a sissy middle path — where political chickens  roost — and make it 20,000 troops.

That way, the left and the right both will be a little kvetchy and a little content.  Mr. Obama can look like a statesman — of a tiny, tiny, state,  I would argue.

As you know, if Mr. Obama had held a starring role in the Old Testament, playing Solomon, he would have  cut the baby in half — and mothers everywhere would have cried, “Messiah Obama, you are a genius. Now both mothers have half a baby. What a blessing. The only darned problem the half-mothers should have in the next 20 years is they will need to go to the shoe store together so that the darned store can sell the right shoe to one family and”— you know the rest of the story.

Should I Say Yes or No or Maybe?

In addition to his most widely advertised deficiencies, that even Democrats are nodding on, President Obama is unable to make a decision — say yes or no to Gen. McChrystal.

The left or the right will be upset with you, but so what?

Drop dead, he is royally incapable of making a weighted decision.

No wonder is sometimes-terrorizing wife is known wide and far as Mad Michelle. When they go out for dinner, she turns to him, and Swish starts swishing. “I don’t know, Mad,” he will whine. “Where do you want to go.”

This is exactly the way he is Presidenting.

This is a gaping character defect that may ruin his ability to effectively govern.

Think back to a  single tough call he has made since Jan. 20.

My slate is empty of Obamisms, but I may be wrong. One call that he made that required a shot of manly courage.

Even the youngest students know that numbers are manipulable, and you might even be able to prove that you do not exist.

By Comparison

But I tarry.

Let us return to Prof. Hanson, who looked at what he calls the hysteria over the Afghanistan War this way this morning:

“Afghanistan is a messy war, but so far it has been conducted with a minimum loss of American life while achieving some important goals. We can argue about current strategies, fault what’s been done in the past, deplore the length of the war, lament its cost, or blame each other for its inconclusiveness, but the facts remain that we removed the Taliban, weakened al-Qaeda in the region, fostered a consensual government in the most unlikely of places, and helped to prevent another catastrophic attack on our nation originating from that part of the world — and did all this with a degree of skill that is reflected in losses that by historical standards are quite moderate.”

Here is Prof. Hanson’s point:

“After the initial invasion, the Afghan front was largely inactive for years. U.S. annual fatalities from 2001 through 2007 (12, 49, 48, 52, 99, 98, 117) averaged about 68. In comparison, the murder total in Chicago for 2007 was 509. Some parts of Chicago were far more dangerous than the Hindu Kush.”

Dr. Hutchinson’s nearby essay notwithstanding, and with apologies to my wife, a native of Chicago, why don’t we send Chicago to Afghanistan?

They couldn’t win the Olympics last  Friday, even with the help of Swish and Mad M.

Maybe they can at least beat the Afghani terrorists so that we sensible people back home can remain safe.

For the mapmakers, just shift Peoria to where Chicago used to be.