For leftists who do have families, they should hope their breadwinners don’t ever compete in the Kentucky Derby.
At choosing, they ain’t very good, morally speaking, a concept that baffles left-wingers.
Leftists recently have brightly polished their knack for hopping aboard knock-kneed nags incapable of winning a one-horse race.
Owing to lifesaving boosts from their partners in the mainstream media, however, leftists have been winning with two legless nags who were crunched and left weeping on the ground.
For 11 months, leftists have been hoisting and celebrating clear-cut election loser Hillary Clinton.
Fairy tale junkies, lefties are blithely unaware she was beaten as decisively as American pioneers defeated hatchet-bearing Indians.
Centuries after the Indians were being walloped 75-0 on a regular basis by pioneers, limp-necked leftists stepped onto the stage.
Clearing their throats, they performed a modern abortion.
Magically they renamed the former savages intensely respectable Indigenous Peoples.
Do you dig?
Any normal person who disagreed would have his head ratcheted a foot higher by an old Indian hatchet.
Decades of lopsided Indian defeats were erased in a whiz.
Oh.
Heroes were rewritten as genocidal maniacs.
Oh.
While contemporary normal people were raising their normal families, American conquests of the Indians secretly were flipped by leftists in hiding.
Scorning black magic for its racist overtones, leftists niftily deployed sleight of greasy hands.
Slicker than deer guts on a door knob, they rewrote the last five centuries. Then they elected a dupe for president. President Dupe sneakily would invest his eight years apologizing for perceived ill behavior – other than his own.
Unhindered by pesky family and job responsibilities, largely single lefties converted American triumphs into genocidal assaults designed to offended prissy leftists.
Oh.
Having murdered Columbus Day, all leftists have left on their to-do list is identifying a publisher of history books who is partial to fairy tales.