[img]1|left|Ari Noonan||no_popup[/img]The carefully calculated amateurish rhetorical stunt that President Obama pulled over the weekend for the two hundredth time since he came to power — and we do mean power — is as tiresome as any child’s unfunny action that he insists on repeating.

From months before anyone outside of Chicago knew who Swish was, Mr. Obama and his handlers have been practicing their favorite carny act, “Yes I Said It But You Misinterpreted Me” routine.

Listen to the stovepipe-hatted circus barker bellow, with a whip in one hand and a bullhorn in the other:

Ladies and gentlemannnnn, boys and girls of all ages everywhere. Step right up! See Swishy do a double flip. See him strenuously endorse a Ground Zero mosque on Friday night because he was addressing a crowd of Muslims, and then try, clumsily, to take back his words the next day because, like most of his Presidential pronouncements, Americans vehemently disapprove.

Swish cannot act as overtly Muslim as he would like because even the race-driven people who voted for him would not have stood for that much brazenness.

His thin record is eplete with illustrations of how his ideological belief system is fueled by Islamic commitment as inarguably as chocolate cake looks and tastes chocolate not strawberry.

The surest bet in Washington — next to the proposition that Every Day This Season Is Vacation Time Anywhere on the Planet for Michelle, Swish and the Little O’s — was that Swish would stand up vigorously for the Ground Zero mosque. They are his people. Why not? However, as the putative leader of our country, he needs to be slightly more nuanced.

And so, at a Ramadan dinner Friday night, Swish — as reliable, mechanical and predictable as a cheap windup doll — told a roomful of fellow Muslims at the White House:

“I understand the emotions that this issue engenders. Ground Zero is, indeed, hallowed ground. But let me be clear: As a citizen and as President, I believe that Muslims have the same right to practice their religion as anyone else in this country. That includes the right to build a place of worship and a community center on private property in lower Manhattan.”

“Private property”? “Lower Manhattan”?

Pal, you are supposed to be a golden orator. Those are the shadowy phrases of a scoundrel, a con man who wants to walk simultaneously in opposing directions. Slicker than deerguts on a doorknob, pal.

“This is America, and our commitment to religious freedom must be unshakeable.”

Sacred ground plainly is a meaningless concept to our oversold, unsavvy, Muslim-conscious President.

Swish is as arrogantly tone deaf as his nouveau riche partner is at belatedly acquiring a sense of dignity.

Four or five of the most prominent political stances Mr. Obama has foolishly assumed in the last year and a half are heavily opposed by Americans.

Undisturbed, President Mute awkwardly ploughs forward with his master plan to redistribute America’s wealth from the people who earned it to his base, the little people who sit on the coping every morning and complain about being victimized by a system that obligates them to work.

Swishy’s ratings raced through the toilet once again Saturday morning from an outraged country that woke up to find him making another still statement that sounded, like a fat man who has just sunk three beers in record time. Reeling, Swish desperately tried to take back what he had said. He told reporters at the site of his family’s second vacation of the week:

“I was not commenting, and I will not comment, on the wisdom of making the decision to put a mosque there. I was commenting very specifically on the right people have that dates back to our founding. That’s what our country is about.”

Swish cannot spread creamy peanut butter over a calculated lie nearly as seamlessly as his advisors and backers think he can.

So, pal, were you lying Friday night or Saturday morning? Pick one. Or I will.