[img]1|left|||no_popup[/img]In the spirit of the times, I expect Wendy Greuel to announce, any edition now, she is a lesbian.

My gosh. The possibilities are intriguingly endless.

Imagine all the mayoralty votes she instantly would pick up for May 21 from naive people on the loopy left. For a year, they have feared she was straight just because she talks funny.

Now if Wendy (Vote for Me Because I Am a Girl) can just convince her hubby to admit he has a proclivity for the gay lifestyle, she will sweep the gay vote and send home Eric Garcetti, winner of the primary, a lopsided loser.

Unless her handler du jour runs out of tape to plaster over her big mouth before Election Day.

Whether she is straight or something else, straight talk is not her strength.

The Magnificent Eight

At least eight key people at the top of her campaign have abruptly quit, been hired, promoted or demoted since last Thursday. In her best Alfred E. Newman imitation, Windy Wendy crossed her eyes and mumbled, “What, me worry?”

When Dakota Smith of the Daily News suggested the two-way stampede in and out of W.W.’s headquarters looked as if she were switching you-know-whats midstream, Ms. Greuel said, witlessly, “We’re not changing horses. We’re bringing in additional resources.”

No absurdity is too extreme.

Windy Wendy, a tip: If it has four legs, a horse head, a swishy tail, complains of a hoarse throat as it goes  “hee-haw, hee-haw,” is on an oats-only diet, lists a barn at Hollypark as his home address, races for a living, formerly was a saddle-tester for Johnny Wayne, and abhors the name Rover, likely it is a horse.

Hand me the lipstick, please.

That was Sunday.

Ms. Smith said that when Windy Wendy again was confronted with the personnel massacre question yesterday at Cal State Northridge, she sought to cement her reputation as non-fast thinker. It’s natural, Ms. Greuel argued, for people to “come and go,” adding that “no one else (besides journalists) really cares.”

Her capacity for opacity is a study in oral mendacity.

The Millinery Mayor

Mayor I Love Me should deposit his dunce cap in a secure vault when he leaves office June 30. Or he could bequeath it early to America’s next Girl Mayor to wear on Sunday in the Easter Parade.

Ms. Smith reports that Windy Wendy political consultant John Shallman characterized the mass walkout and scurryup shuffle of survivors and retreads thusly:

“We’re rolling out an enhanced program.”

First time I ever heard a plane crash described as an exercise in growth.

As Windy Wendy was hitching a ride on the All God’s Children Are Gay bandwagon, in the Supreme Court spirit of the moment, John Schwada sends word this afternoon that City Atty. Carmen Trutanich, locked in a tough re-election campaign against Mike Feuer, formally is aligned with the galloping majority:

 
“We do not have a choice to change who we are, gay or straight,” Mr. Trutanich said. “But we do have a clear choice as individuals and as a society to define how we treat others.  Man or woman, gay or straight, black or white, rich or poor, short or tall, we are all entitled to equal treatment under the law. Our country is long overdue in recognizing the equal rights of gay and lesbian couples who wish to marry.
 
“Regardless of your position on marriage equality, this week is one of historic significance on the issue of civil rights and the U.S. Supreme Court. For the first time in its history, the Court has agreed to hear the issue of same-sex marriage, and for the first time since 1967, when it ruled that laws banning interracial marriage were unconstitutional, the Court has agreed to hear a marriage equality case.”

Tomorrow we will tackle the loopy left’s un-imaginative repackaging of the concept “equality” to suit their politically correct needs.